The Eagles, Joe Walsh would be a hoot to snort a 8 ball with.

Bob Weston, Nice shoes.

Elisa Ambrogio of the magik markers.. i heard you play a riff one time

Whenever the Grateful Dead put out a record you could bet that it would be perfectly round with a hole right in the middle.

Phish. You have a really tasty ice-cream named in your honour. Plus, the Boredoms did a really great 'cover' of a song of yours.

Wow, that's two things! I feel great now.

Hey, Meatloaf! Nice tits!

I have just been informed that as well as naming their tastiest variety of ice-cream after the awful Phish, Ben and Jerry's also have a Dave Matthew's Band flavour. Dear lord.

And yeah, i already know about the Grateful Dead/Cherry Garcia flavour as well. Those ice-cream dudes got baaad taste in music.

The Butthole Surfers: We went to the same college! Alright!

And hey, "There's a time to shit and a time for God/The last shit I took was pretty fucking odd!" That's funny!

"Pepper!" That song was pretty catchy and better than 99% of everything else on the radio! Alright!

"Human Cannonball!" That's a cool song!

And to Gibby: I grew up watching your dad's tv show! Mr. Peppermint! Alright!

Mike Doughty, lame old hipsters will always love you in Minneapolis. You should move here and get it over with.

Spearhead, you really cornered the marked on sea shell braided necklace wearing freshman white kids who live in dorms. Way to be.

Britney Spears, you really know how to grow breasts.

Dave Matthews, I cannot think of a better "jam band" with an African American violinist.

Mary Kate Olsen, I am confident that it would take many hammer blows to bring you down.