How many cats do you have?

13
Reginald-Female (Reggie for short) and Dr. J (Will you get the fuck out of the way for short).
Reggie is obese and when not clawing the hell out of your blue jeans in the most inappropriate of places she will simply put a paw on you. When not found on the couch annoying you for a good petting, Reggie can be found curled up on the subwoofer, her favorite spot.
Dr. J is a stupid prick. He is hyperactive and likes to roughhouse. He doesn't seem to mind when you do your impression of the old guy from Cool Hand Luke who keeps saying "That's my baby boy, Luke", in fact it appears as though that's one of the few things he responds to. He also enjoys tripping people.
If you would like one or both of these animals, send me, oh, about $10 and write my girlfriend a very nice letter assuring her that the animal in question will not come to harm, but, really, I understand that you would be under legal obligation to me to not eat them.
But, Charlie, why sell such wonderful animals? you ask.
Well, it was around the time Dr. J developed the habit of following me into the bathroom to watch me pee that I decided his lease is up, and since Reggie is no more than a glorified paper weight with legs (which I don't need as all of my paperwork is done away from breeze) I figured it's time these two did something productive around here: get sold!
PM me with an offer*, and keep it on the down low.

*Not really.
This is going to get worse before it gets any better.

How many cats do you have?

17
I co-habit with 2 cats, Ouzle and Chloe, both rescue cats. Brother and sister, they fucking hate each other. I have lived with them for 10+ years and have yet to see any signs of affection between them. (Chloe has a nick in her ear thanks to her brother)

And... if can work out how to I will post a couple of pictures of said beasts.
I order that you be taken from this court, henceforth to a place of confinement, there to dwell in perpetual fear of being chibbed and humped by rabid schemies.

How many cats do you have?

19
It started with one stray, and then about a year later, we had about 10. We simply could not afford to have them fixed. All of them made it to safe homes, and now we're back down to two, who will not be pictured. One is "husky" but I promise it is mostly muscle. Champion of 100+ fights for sure. Its a weird thing being the "cat family" of the neighborhood.

Sadly, this cat, Shark Attack, belongs to a bandmate, and not me.
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