My band is The Flux Capacitor

Definitely NOT CRAP

monocle-nc.

Apathetic wrote:My band is The Flux Capacitor

Definitely NOT CRAP

That was the name of my first band when I was in high school

after that I played in several bands whose names were of varying Crap/Not Crap Distinction

Autocrash : Not Crap
Spetznaz: Not Crap
Malebomb : Crap
Chubbicoxx: Crap
Bukake and Friends: Not Crap

The current band I play in, Antlers, too early to tell.
BTW, Brett Eugene, your poetics have made me laugh out loud in a crowded office, for this I thank you.

-Jeremy

oucheh wrote:Antlers

I like this band name a lot.

I would like the band name "Hintler" even more.

Sigh.

You're all trying so hard, rhyming like Shel Silverstein's rejected jizm while I sit here, stranded in my lonely midterm quarantine prison. I'm stuck here with Mrs. Ralph doing a case study on the fungus seeping out of her all ruddy and muddy. You cats think you're dropping mad beats? Y'all triflin'. Ma Ralph and I are graphing out the frequency of her burning belching queefs. Her hootchie's a busted-out trampoline; what with the green beans and spuds growing out of her drawers, the warts and curdled discharge, it's cuisine for Mr. Stackmatic slopping up next to her eight-teat automatic milking machine.

Shit! Girl just dropped her spleen! Called the medic, but he's not too keen on her obscene learing at his ballsack, licking her chops, wanting to shove that all up into her dental plaque.

God give me enough caffeine to get through another night of having to convene with fifteen more sanitation trucks carrying off the remains of her crotch a la florentine. A few more weeks and I'll be free of this service routine, the antibiotics and antipsychotics and future vaccines, I'll publish all my arithmetic means of her infections and compulsions and all that lead to our dear Mr. Brett Eugene.

Angus Jung wrote:

Brett Eugene Ralph wrote:I never dreamed it would take a foreigner
To go all "Rime of the Ancient Mariner."

Hell, "Rime" was covered by Iron Maiden
Yo, that's what the singer called your mom when she laid him
And once he'd had all of Mrs. Ralph's fun,
Bruce went ahead and put his Dick-in-son.
Too late to run to the hills,
Bruce gonna nut in all the Ralph grillz.

Not bad, Angus, not bad at all,
But like my man Icarus, you’re bound to fall
When you fly too close to Mrs. Ralph’s son
I’ll melt your wack wax in more ways than one.

It’s funny you mention Maiden to me—
My semen is made in your mom’s mouth, you see.
A toilet’s where I found the number of this beast;
The message read: “I need some cum for my feast!
Be quick or be dead, dude, ‘cause I need it now—
Need your slop for my hog, your mud for my sow.”
Well, I was no prowler, but what I could I do?
This was a howler I must look into.

Had to run to the hills to find her shabby shack
Where eagles won’t dare, where wolves won’t attack.
To tame a land like that one must contend
With the rank pussy stench running free in the wind.
But I was a trooper, I close-pinned my nose
And knuckled down: I had high hopes for my hose.
At two minutes to midnight, I knocked on her door;
By the witching hour, I was ass-deep in that whore.

Straight up, she asked me, “Can I play with Madness?”
That’s what she called His Royal Gonad-ness.
After a while—those Ben Wa balls were killers—
She said, “Put your pickle in my Phyllis Diller!”
So I latexed up my machete engorged
And began murdering her funky Rue Morgue.
Then I found sanctuary deep in her caboose;
My dick was a drifter though—that shit was loose!

She said, “Show me some wrath, child! Hurry! Come on!
You’re gonna die if you leave that 'boot' on.”
So I slipped off the Magnum on which I’d insisted
And climbed back up on her. Again we persisted.
With a staggering stalk, Brett Eugene controlled her
And we made some small talk as I cold corn-holed her.
She revealed something quite out of this world:
Angus Jung—it turns out—he is a girl!

“Well, bring your daughter to the slaughter next time,” I said.
“There’s more where this cum’s from or my name’s not Ed!”
(At some point she’d started calling me ‘Eddie’
When the ‘ed of my dick was deep in her black betty.)
Angus, I’ll give one more piece of my mind—
Next time I’ll be taking you both from behind.
You’ll be my powerslaves all night long.
We’ll play ‘Quest for Fire’ like my ho’ Rae Dawn Chong.

Yes, I’ll be the phantom of this operation
‘Cause I’m the one who performed Miss Jung’s castration.
She’d been born a boy, but she wasn’t for long;
It was only fair that I dinged off her dong.
A peter so small had to be disconnected,
And poor little Angus, s/he was dejected.
But not Mrs. Angus, she picked up that dicklet
And popped it right into her mouth like a Chiclet.

She chewed it and burst lil’ Angus’s bubble,
And since then they both have been nothing but trouble.

* * *

See, I closed with a couplet—just like a sonnet.
If you think you’re wo-man enough, get back up on it!

my first band (in seventh grade) was called Purpul Monkee Dishwasher. this was crap.

my second band was called Musabi, which i still rather like. not crap, certainly.

my third band was called Half Mad, which is my favorite band name i've ever come up with ever.

my fourth band was called Francophone. also not crap

my current band is, as of yet, nameless.

and i play songs by myself under the name instant zen, which of course is not crap.

that is all.

Apathetic wrote:My band is The Flux Capacitor

Definitely NOT CRAP

I dunno if they're still around, but there was a ska band in Minneapolis called Flux Skapacitor.

DrAwkward wrote:I dunno if they're still around, but there was a ska band in Minneapolis called Flux Skapacitor.

no Skaba the Hut, but not bad!

first band i was in was called sugarkane joe. sweet holy jesus that name sucked. this became saturn returns. i left this band. next band was called station. this band split up. no im all alone. but i want to start a band called either 'the carnies', 'the welfare of the little orphans', or 'post wank guilt', which is probably the best name that i have ever heard.