stewie wrote:Talking to a colleague at a urinal and letting a sneaky rasper slip out.

just better = a sandwich from a vending machine
just worse = that perpetually-sniffing kid you knew in grade school that always had a visible booger in one nostril

Please, kenny:
- being the guy who thoughtfully brought the bag of matchlight charcoal to tmidgett's cookout, only to read on an internet message board 3 years later that the ungrateful tmidgett is now making cracks about and still trying to rid himself of this albatross-around-the-neck bag of matchlight charcoal


p.s. to tmidgett - "boner at the pool" would make a great band name or album title

Please, kenny:
- being the guy who thoughtfully brought the bag of matchlight charcoal to tmidgett's cookout, only to read on an internet message board 3 years later that the ungrateful tmidgett is now making cracks about and still trying to rid himself of this albatross-around-the-neck bag of matchlight charcoal

JB : being this same guy, only with a cool name and cool pictures of birds and stuff
JW : being at a guy's house, having him give you a tour of some of his latest toys (videogames, yoyo's, pingpong table, etc) and he says to you something about even though he's old, he still likes his toys, and getting toys is better than getting a sweater or something. you're there for his birthday party. you brought him a sweater.

SHO-RYU-KEN!

forgetting to apologize to the cockroach you just captured, threw in the toilet, and hit with a quick round of "death from above", the piss-on-a-bug-in-the-toilet game.

i don't remember who brought the matchlight

but it was not stack

forgetting to apologize to the cockroach you just captured, threw in the toilet, and hit with a quick round of "death from above", the piss-on-a-bug-in-the-toilet game.

j.b. you kill an irritating mosquito whilst sitting on your back porch reading a book about zen buddhism

j.w. you are talking to someone you know perfectly well, but somehow you are possessed by an irrational fear that you have the person's name wrong. so you call them 'man' or 'ya' or mumble something indeterminate where you would normally say one's name.

kenny?

benjamin franklin

tmidgett wrote:Benjamin Franklin

Just Better: Mark Twain
Just Worse: Hank Williams

Kenny: A white hot three way sex romp between Benjamin Franklin, Mark Twain and Hank Williams

Bradley R. Weissenberger wrote:Kenny: A white hot three way sex romp between Benjamin Franklin, Mark Twain and Hank Williams

jb: a white hot three way sex romp between franklin bruno, mark stewart, and hank williams jr

jw: having to sit through antietam to see yo la tengo. ugh.



buy the kentortions: the career arc of mr. james chance

the career arc of mr. james chance

j.b. the career arc of patti smith or arto lindsay or probably even lydia lunch or glenn branca

j.w. the career arc of nick zedd

kenny:?!?!?!?!?!

a three-on-three basketball game. one team is franklin bruno the songwriter, greg norman the technician of electrical audio, and ike turner of this message board. the other team is frank bruno the heavyweight boxer, greg norman the famous golfer, and ike turner the wifebeating guitarist. and they are playing on 'dunk hoops,' on a hot day, with an overinflated ball that is therefore too 'bouncy.'

a three-on-three basketball game. one team is franklin bruno the songwriter, greg norman the technician of electrical audio, and ike turner of this message board. the other team is frank bruno the heavyweight boxer, greg norman the famous golfer, and ike turner the wifebeating guitarist. and they are playing on 'dunk hoops,' on a hot day, with an overinflated ball that is therefore too 'bouncy.'

JB : monkeys playing miniature golf using loaded shotguns instead of putters
JW : sitting in a way that somewhat crushes the testes

ken.

the years-later charm of a "poloroid", taken with an oldschool instant camera.

toomanyhelicopters wrote:

the years-later charm of a "poloroid", taken with an oldschool instant camera.

JB - The years-later charm of super-8 home movies shot by family you don't know or remember.

JW - The years-later charm of 35mm slides shot on film with unstable dyes and the color balance is completely whacked.


Stan KENton-ize, concert jazz style:

Riding the Brown Line downtown @ 8:30AM on a weekday.....

Stan KENton-ize, concert jazz style:

Riding the Brown Line downtown @ 8:30AM on a weekday.....

j.b. a sack lunch consisting of pb&j on white bread, carrots,
and a glass of dean's skim milk

j.w. doing shots with johnson, pettiwhite, and their friend, macho,
at john barleycorn's.

kenny!
having a week of feeling like you've already eaten lunch at every establishment located
within a reasonable distance of your workplace