5
by djimbe_Archive
My neighbor has a functioning amphibious troop carrier from the Korean Konflict in his front yard. It's painted yellow. It's lawn art. So is the fully functional '60's vintage fire truck (that's red like you might expect). There used to be a giant chain saw carved bear in the front yard too, but the base rotted and he fell over. In the winter, there's usually an 8 foot tall snowman made out of painted harbor bouys. Around Hallowe'en, there are harbor bouys painted to look like 4 foot diameter Jack O' Lanterns, and frequently an enormous spider made out of those large cylindrical hay bails and 6" PVC field drain hose. There's also a manequin about 30 feet up a 60 foot light pole in the back near his numerous barns. Don't know what that's about...never had the courage to ask.
So he's a pack rat with odd taste in outdoor decoration. He's also completely convinced that his house and property are haunted by a benign spirit named Lester. Lester talks through the medium of a light over one of the barn doors. Ask the light a yes or no question. Go ahead, don't be shy. One flicker means yes, two means no. The problem isn't Lester so much as some of the bad ghost crowd Lester brings by. The story about the exorcism Mr. Neighbor had performed several years ago took him over an hour to tell me, so I won't even attempt to repeat it. I can't stess enough how completely serious this man is about his haunting. Seems like every other time I see him, there's more to tell. Even asks me pretty regular how the ghosts at my place are getting on.
He built himself a sizable sawmill just to cut the wood up. I've never seen him sell it or give it away or anything. He maintains his own personal junk yard on several acres across the road. It's full of old trucks and cars and parts of a local kids amusement park that got junked about 20 years ago. There's gotta be 3000 railroad ties there, and I know there are at least 4 car lifts (like out of a professional repair garage). It's right by his 2 acre home vegetable garden that he plants, but only harvests like 30% of. Plants it mostly to bounce around on one of his many tractors and watch it grow. Then there's the pig. That's a story for another time, too. Same with the gosling that followed him around like a puppy for an entire year as it grew up.
He's a nice guy. Very helpful, very neighborly. Stone crazy, though...
