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by toomanyhelicopters_Archive
in what way did she miss the point of irony? i've actually, dare i say it, found her to be a rather intelligent person, the times i've heard her speak. she might be kinda hippie-ish or something, but i don't think she's a dummy or anything.
PLEASE BEAR IN MIND THAT EVERYTHING I TYPE FROM HERE ON OUT IS IN CAPS, BECAUSE I WANT TO DISTINGUISH IT FROM THE LYRICS, AND ALSO BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT I AM SHOUTING AT YOU! I AM SHOUTING, QUITE LOUDLY ACTUALLY! PLEASE PICTURE HER SINGING AND ME SHOUTING MY SYNOPSIS! IT'S SO MUCH MORE IRONIC THAT WAY!
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An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
THIS IS SURELY AN EXMAPLE OF IRONY. IT WOULD BE MORE IRONIC IF HE WAS 19, BUT WINNING THE LOTTERY AND IMMEDIATELY DYING, WHEN IT'S PAID IN YEARLY SUMS, YES, IT'S AS IF HE WON NOTHING. THOSE BASTARDS KEPT ALL HIS MONEY! BASTARDS!
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
I SAY YES. A BLACK FLY ON YOUR PICNIC TABLE, NO. BUT IN CHARDONNAY, YES.
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
YES. THEY DISCOVERED AT THE LAST SECOND HE WAS INNOCENT, BUT JUST A HAIR TOO LATE. IRONIC. SURE, WHY NOT.
It's like rain on your wedding day
ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED OUTDOORS, IN TUSCON. VERY FUCKING IRONIC THEN, ISN'T IT?
It's a free ride when you've already paid
*ALWAYS* IRONIC WHEN THIS HAPPENS. AND ANNOYING. YOU TAKE A TAXI TO THE AIRPORT, THE METER SAYS $27.75, YOU HAND HIM $30 AND AS YOU'RE GETTING OUT, HE SAYS "OH, THAT WAS A FREE RIDE. BUT YOU ALREADY PAID." SO FUCKING IRONIC IT HURTS.
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
I'M NOT TOO SURE ABOUT THIS ONE. THIS MIGHT BE A TOUGH ONE TO RATIONALIZE.
Who would've thought...it figures
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
YES, THIS IS WHOLLY IRONIC. TEXTBOOK EXAMPLE. NEVER FLOWN IN HIS LIFE CAUSE HE WAS TOO SCARED, FINALLY GOT THE GUTS, AND THEN THE PLANE CRASHED. THE ODDS OF THIS ARE UTTERLY ASTRONOMICAL. QUINTESSENTIAL IRONY.
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face
THIS IS JUST THE BRIDGE. NOTHING TO SEE HERE. MOVE ALONG.
A traffic jam when you're already late
IRONY.
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
WEAK, BUT IRONY.
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
IRONY. THAT'S A FUCK OF A LOT OF SPOONS.
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
I THINK YES. IF HE'S TRULY THE ONE PERFECT PERSON FOR HER, BUT HE'S ALREADY TAKEN, THAT QUALIFIES AS IRONY.
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
A little too ironic...and yeah I really do think...
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures
Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out
OKAY, I JUST REALIZED, THAT... sorry, song's over, no need to shout anymore. man that bitch has some lungs on her! a better example for "free ride when you already paid" would be if you bought a plane ticket to fly home from NYC to canada, eh, but a week before the flight (which might crash, btw) a friend says "hey, i'm driving back up to winnepeg, eh, you need a ride?" see, it woulda been free, but you paid $200 for a ticket. you moron.
seriously, has anybody else noticed that, serious, total fucking twins, dave grohl, and jennifer capriati, right? can't tell them apart? is it just me?