All the regulars on this board, myself included, are musical elitists (denial’s only the 1st step folks) with strong feelings about what’s deplorable and what’s koo, and I’m wondering how you hold yourselves among the lovable philistines of your world.

For those who own and work in recording studios there’re no doubt professional modes of behavior that govern this sort of thing, but what about family gatherings, etc. Maybe you work with some decent, even interesting people who insist there’s nothing wrong with listening to a lot of Moby.

Are you a cocksucker about it when someone gives you a ride home from work and all the Cds in the console are total fucking shit? What about the band you share rehearsal space with who lend you their van whenever you need it, but sound like Mazzy Star with Eddie Vedder Jr. on vocals?

I want to know. Tell me about the times you’ve needlessly insulted in-laws and colleagues by spitting on the “mix-cdâ€

I use to be an insufferable asshole about it. But I've aged and spent time trying not to walk around this beautiful earth with a heart full of rage. Universal Loving Kindness, etc. It's hard.

My ladyfriend came home several weeks ago with a CD by a popular singer-songwriter who is kinda hot right now (really can't remember his name at the moment). We were listening to it in the car, and it was perhaps the worst, most soul-less shit I had heard in years, and I blew up and went on a big angry music man-rant. She didn't talk to me for hours, but admitted a week or so later that, yes, this young man's Compact Disc was, in fact, shit.

Even worse is friends and acquaintances who are in crappy bands. Especially musically accomplished and crowd-pleasing bands that just happen to, in my opinion, suck.

So mostly, I just try to Love Everybody.

I've made some regrettable utterances in the past, so now I try to do the same: try to find the good parts and look the other way on the questionable musical tastes. If people ask me, though, I'll tell them because there's nothing worse than faking an opinion.

I once worked with this ex-con ex-gangbanger that had a teardrop tatoo and I shit you not he said his favorite band was Bon Jovi.

That was excellent.

I tend to draw a line in the sand as far as music goes, either it sucks or it rules. This may step on toes inadvertently as I talk too much, but I've learned to be a lot more polite about music. Frankly I don't care if someone listens to shit music as long as I don't feel that I have to enjoy it.

I've got really old friends who are way into jam bands and that's kool, they get something out of their noodle rock and they love it dearly. I think that as long as music is eliciting some sort of guttural response, it's prolly okay. Plus, the Jam band folks always have the best pot.



Faiz

For the most part, I "grin and bear it": for instance, I was riding dirtbikes with my brother and his girlfriend yesterday. His girlfriend wanted to listen to "country music" (you know, Toby Keith, Garth Brooks, that kind) during the 2 hour drive to the desert. I sucked it up for two hours. My thinking is, taste is just that, taste, and whatever I may think about other people letting their taste be defined by the "popular media" or whatever, who's to say that may tastes aren't equally a reaction against those same forces.

That is not to say that I am completely at peace with my musical snobbery. I decided after going out with yet another girl who wanted to listen to Lenny Kravitz or whatever that I would never again date a girl with music taste that didn't correspond with mine. Of course, after 8 years working at record stores and 20 years collecting and playing music, it's hard to find anybody whose tastes are as diverse and as "well-honed" as mine, but I have found a girl who at least likes good rock music. She thinks Steve Albini is "hot", and actually had her one copy of Husker Du "Zen Arcade" before I even met her. We still have problems, though: every time I try to listen to Anthony Braxton or Roland Kirk or Peter Brotzmann or something of that ilk, she has a fit. I feel confident that I can change her, though...

With the exception of this so called "new country" like Toby Keith and others, I can bear to listen to almost anything. Some of my oldest friends have this alterna-rock band that really isn't my shtick, but they are good at doing what they are doing. Even horrid crap like Staind have their good points. I personally don't know what they are but they have to have them or else millions now living should always die.

Case by case.

Though I'm generally honest when asked my opinion of music, I guess I'm a switch hitter on this. A recent example:

I went to get my hair cut on Wednesday. Music was playing in the barbershop, but for the life of me, I can't remember what it was right now. Since they always seems to play Frank Sinatra, let's say it was Frank. Whatever it was, it was fine, and somewhat comforting in that it suited the situation. It was music you could trust to accompany good barbering.

The tape ended. The guy cutting my hair walked over to the stereo, announced, "how about a little... country", and put in another tape. OK - sounds fine; I was expecting Hank Williams? Maybe Buck Owens.

As the strains of fiddle from the far speaker battled across the room with the furious dobro nearby, my haircut continued:

barber: "you don't hear much from this guy anymore... Garth Brooks?"

me: "yeeeah... He was huge there for a while, wasn't he..."

barber: "they say he sold more records that Elvis" (oh yeah, the previous tape was Elvis)

me: blah blah blah...

He was right. I hadn't heard from Garth Brooks - nor of, nor plain heard him - in quite a while, though I was quickly reminded of why that was fine by me. As a matter of barbershop banter, I could have pursued my thoughts on this, but A) the barber put the music on, presumably because he likes it, and B) he was currently cutting my hair. Not wanting to chance trouble with the coiffure, I let it slide.

As it turns out, it wasn't the best cut this guy has done, by a long shot. Had I critiqued the music, I might have found myself wondering if the rankled barber took out his disgreement on my head, but now I'm comfortable resting the blame squarely on Garth... for stinking up the place, and obviously distracting the barber from doing his job properly.

-Tom

Josh, thanks for reminding me yet again of Garth. Maybe he's making a comeback.

tgavin wrote:As a matter of barbershop banter, I could have pursued my thoughts on this, but A) the barber put the music on, presumably because he likes it, and B) he was currently cutting my hair. Not wanting to chance trouble with the coiffure, I let it slide.

I just had this same encounter! The plump, pierced and black lipsticked woman who cuts my hair asked me what I thought of the Depeche Mode that was playing over the stereo.

I try not to offer unsolicited negative opinions to friends and strangers. If asked, though, I'm not going to lie. And it was Depeche Mode! So I told her that I thought that Depeche Mode was one of the worst bands in the history of mankind.

She was very resentful, but the haircut went well, and I received several compliments on it. I still frequent her shop, and we get along well, me and Jami J.

Damn!

Well, to be fair, the non-descript, middle-aged Italian-American guy who cut my hair didn't really ask my opinion of Garth's music, but maybe I should push the issue next time... get him to step up to the plate on both music and cutting. Either that, or look for a place that plays even worse music.

-Tom

But he didn't ask your opinion. Why volunteer it to him?

You'll just end up driving yourself crazy if you start going off everytime you hear Muzak or the 10,000th commercial that features Smashmouth. So Garth Brook sucks! So Smashmouth sucks! Your barber, the check out clerk, the lifeguard and the guy at Jiffy Lube probably don't need to hear that from you. Bring your frustrations here or go make some rock.

Of course, if your barber specifically asks you what you think of Garth Brooks, well, then small talk time is over.