Bambouche wrote:My high school girlfriend's father had suffered a stroke, somehow related to his alcoholism. He couldn't walk and talked with a terrible slur.

So, we're in high school, and we want to fool around. We decide to go back to her parent's place. We walk in, she says "hi" to mom and dad and we quickly walk to her room. Her dad, visibly angry, was trying to tell her that I wasn't allowed in the house, much less in her room, but she just grabbed my arm and walked quickly down the hall, all the while her dad slurring "Noooooo!"

We're in her room, trying to do it, and I can hear her dad dragging his withered frame down the hall, slurring "Noooooo!" It's pretty creepy.

"Just ignore him," she says, and locks the door.

We get back to it. Her dad crawled all the way to her door and started feebly pounding on it, slurring hysterically. Finally we stop. And I decide it's a good time for me to leave. We open the door, and there's dad, stretched out on the floor, fuming.

As I stepped over him to leave, he made the sex hand gesture (poking finger through hole) and slurringly yelled at me:

"YUUUU NOOOO FUKKKK MMMMY DOTTERRRRRRR!"

madlee wrote:

caix wrote:I predict you will be married in six month's time, whether you like it or not.

Colonel Panic = Humbert Humbert

Bambouche wrote:My high school girlfriend's father had suffered a stroke, somehow related to his alcoholism. He couldn't walk and talked with a terrible slur.

So, we're in high school, and we want to fool around. We decide to go back to her parent's place. We walk in, she says "hi" to mom and dad and we quickly walk to her room. Her dad, visibly angry, was trying to tell her that I wasn't allowed in the house, much less in her room, but she just grabbed my arm and walked quickly down the hall, all the while her dad slurring "Noooooo!"

We're in her room, trying to do it, and I can hear her dad dragging his withered frame down the hall, slurring "Noooooo!" It's pretty creepy.

"Just ignore him," she says, and locks the door.

We get back to it. Her dad crawled all the way to her door and started feebly pounding on it, slurring hysterically. Finally we stop. And I decide it's a good time for me to leave. We open the door, and there's dad, stretched out on the floor, fuming.

As I stepped over him to leave, he made the sex hand gesture (poking finger through hole) and slurringly yelled at me:

"YUUUU NOOOO FUKKKK MMMMY DOTTERRRRRRR!"

Bambouche wrote:My high school girlfriend's father had suffered a stroke, somehow related to his alcoholism. He couldn't walk and talked with a terrible slur. ........"YUUUU NOOOO FUKKKK MMMMY DOTTERRRRRRR!"

caix wrote:and she got some of her juice on it and I didn't notice until after we met back up with her mom.

"What's that on your shirt?" her mom asked me. I don't even remember what I said. I just played it off like I spilled something.

caix wrote:"What's that on your shirt?" her mom asked me. I don't even remember what I said. I just played it off like I spilled something.

ant man bee wrote:
Glad to know that I have knocked out the most fucked up thing I will read today before lunch....thanks Bambouche!

Bambouche wrote:My high school girlfriend's father had suffered a stroke, somehow related to his alcoholism. He couldn't walk and talked with a terrible slur.

So, we're in high school, and we want to fool around. We decide to go back to her parent's place. We walk in, she says "hi" to mom and dad and we quickly walk to her room. Her dad, visibly angry, was trying to tell her that I wasn't allowed in the house, much less in her room, but she just grabbed my arm and walked quickly down the hall, all the while her dad slurring "Noooooo!"

We're in her room, trying to do it, and I can hear her dad dragging his withered frame down the hall, slurring "Noooooo!" It's pretty creepy.

"Just ignore him," she says, and locks the door.

We get back to it. Her dad crawled all the way to her door and started feebly pounding on it, slurring hysterically. Finally we stop. And I decide it's a good time for me to leave. We open the door, and there's dad, stretched out on the floor, fuming.

As I stepped over him to leave, he made the sex hand gesture (poking finger through hole) and slurringly yelled at me:

"YUUUU NOOOO FUKKKK MMMMY DOTTERRRRRRR!"

caix wrote:Jesus, Bambouche... Why the hell didn't you guys just try to do it somewhere less creepy?