Peripatetic wrote:The environment's already fucked; flush the toilet.

B_M_L wrote:My peeing outdoors story:
I was on my way home from a party some time ago in the early hours of the morning, drunk, tripping and not a little stoned too. I stopped by some bushes to relieve myself. I’d only just got a good flow going when a snake came slowly winding out of the bushes. I’d obviously disturbed its sleep. I was utterly terrified, frozen still, unable to breath, but unable to run as I was in full pee flow now. I thought my time had come. I could only watch as the angry beast slowly passed between my feet. I’m sure I could hear it hiss as it made it’s way behind me. It occurred to me how awful it would be to die like this. I’d be discovered, my body cold, on the side of the road, pants undone, dick in my hand, dead. The blood tests would reveal to my family I was full of all kind of narcotics and alcohol. They’d never check for a snake bite – they’d just assume I was so tanked I collapsed while trying to beat off in the bushes! So I mustered all my strength and forced the last wee I could out… I was peeing for my life people! I was peeing for my honour! And yes, I was peeing the reputation of my family!

As soon I’d finished I focused all my energy – I lept away and started running in a single motion. I had escaped!

It wasn’t until I was a good twenty yards away that it occurred to me that there are no snakes in New Zealand! I had in my hallucinatory state, just been scared witless by a dreaded froth-head pee snake…

I still piss outdoors though. I often laugh while I’m doing it for this reason.

zom-zom wrote:Would you Englishmen please change all of your avatars to either Double-Decker buses, British Heinz Bean cans or Watney's Red Barrel logos so we can more easily understand your posts? So we have a reference point?

Tommy Alpha wrote:

zom-zom wrote:Would you Englishmen please change all of your avatars to either Double-Decker buses, British Heinz Bean cans or Watney's Red Barrel logos so we can more easily understand your posts? So we have a reference point?

Only if all you colonial types change yours to Slim Pickens riding the bomb at the end of Dr. Strangelove


Deal?

Tommy Alpha wrote:

zom-zom wrote:Would you Englishmen please change all of your avatars to either Double-Decker buses, British Heinz Bean cans or Watney's Red Barrel logos so we can more easily understand your posts? So we have a reference point?

Only if all you colonial types change yours to Slim Pickens riding the bomb at the end of Dr. Strangelove


Deal?