The Comedy of Craigslist

181
otisroom wrote:
Marsupialized wrote:I need advice about A.A. (Burbank)
Reply to: pers-387206259@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-01, 6:41PM CDT


I drank heavily for some 15 years till my doctor told me I had pretty serious kidney damage and had to stop drinking. So I joined Alcoholics Anonymous, and I fucking HATED it, but I did stop drinking.
Well, I've been sober for almost 3 years now and a couple weeks ago I read about something called "auto-erotic asphyxiation"- basically you wrap a belt or something around your neck to cut off the blood from your brain and when you whack off the pressure builds until your about to pass out, then right as you cum you release the belt and the rush of blood intensifies the orgasm like 1000 times.
It's supposed to be a MAJOR buzz and you can do it without messing up your sobriety!
I've been trying this all this last weekend and this week and I must be doing it wrong because it's not working. I tried it with a belt and it wouldn't get tight enough, so then I tried it with a bungee cord with hooks on the ends. I wrapped this bungee cord around my neck like 8 times and hooked it and started beating off like CRAZY and all that happened was the blood vessels in my eyes bursted so I've had to wear sunglasses all week long to hide my blood-red eyes.
They look so gross!
Then I tried it with a length of rope and kinda hung myself from my shower curtain rod, but right when I was about to cum the rod broke and I fell and whacked my head against the sink, and the rough rope tore the shit out of my neck and bruised it all up so I've had to wear turtleneck shirts to work all week, and it's SO fucking hot everyone thinks I'm drinking again cuz I've been wearing the sunglasses and turtlenecks all the time and I have a big purple knot on my head where I hit the sink.
What am I doing wrong?
Why isn't it working?
I've though about getting some rubber hose and trying with that but I've already wasted like 40$ on belts and bungee cord and rope so I need to get this right, I'm kinda low on cash till I get paid next week.
Serious Replies Only.


* Location: Burbank
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests


No fair Marsup. You can't post your own adds.


I have serious reply for this bozo: "If make me the beneficiary of your Life Insurance Policy, I will reveal the "secret" you are so avidly seeking."

This guy is clearly working a solid program, eh?
Redline wrote:Not Crap. The sound of death? The sound of FUN! ScrrreeEEEEEEE

The Comedy of Craigslist

182
http://saltlakecity.craigslist.org/hsh/458004014.html

NEED TO FIND Jurassic Park Sleeping Bag
Reply to: sale-458004014@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-10-24, 12:45AM MDT


My husband's treasured Jurassic Park Sleeping Bag got sent accidentally to Deseret Industries.
I am looking for someone who might have one like it that I can buy or who can keep a look out for one at DI

susan herbst
512-635-2690
susangolden@juno.com



the DI is a thrift store.

The Comedy of Craigslist

183
juice wrote:http://saltlakecity.craigslist.org/hsh/458004014.html

NEED TO FIND Jurassic Park Sleeping Bag
Reply to: sale-458004014@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-10-24, 12:45AM MDT


My husband's treasured Jurassic Park Sleeping Bag got sent accidentally to Deseret Industries.
I am looking for someone who might have one like it that I can buy or who can keep a look out for one at DI

susan herbst
512-635-2690
susangolden@juno.com



the DI is a thrift store.

How old is her husband? Nine?
It's Too Late For Logic

The Comedy of Craigslist

186
Reply to: comm-475262616@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-10, 11:28PM CST


looking for some guys that wanna get together and play some fall out boy songs. possibly create some originals if we are cohesive enough.

i'm an older fan, so you guys should be open to playing both the old songs and new songs. a blink song here and there is fun too.




Location: chicago
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 475262616
Rick Reuben wrote:Marsupialized reminds me of freedom

The Comedy of Craigslist

187
Very hairy kitty wanted...are you au naturale? - m4w - 38

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-475808513@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-11, 5:07PM EST


Title just about says it all.

Some guys like bare beavers.

I'm tired of all the smooth, bare beavers. I want it the ole fashioned way - growing like a weed, unabated!

Interested? If yes, keep reading...

You need to be an attractive WF, interesting, fun, intelligent and perhaps in need of extra $.

I'm an attractive WM, with an obvious fetish for women sporting a lot of growth down below.

Sound like fun?

Email me and let's talk.




That bolded line is pretty killer, you must admit.
Last edited by SecondEdition_Archive on Sun Nov 11, 2007 9:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Life...life...I know it's got its ups and downs.

Groucho Marx wrote:Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

The Comedy of Craigslist

188
Ignore my previous one. This is genius.



We are talking truly disturbing here...



need bud who wants to JO to jim carreys the Mask - m4m - 52

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Reply to: pers-475991474@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-11, 8:52PM EST


Hello there i am looking for a cool jo bud on the down low who wants to get together for a movie night and tonigth we are watching jim carreys The Mask. No gay stuff only JO but I want white guys only and no one over my age and a big dick is a plus+++. I typically put the youngins to bed around 9:30 so you can ocme over around 10 or 11 i will leave the back door unlocked. Also its on vhs and i want to record this jo session if its cool with you (also on vhs)
Life...life...I know it's got its ups and downs.

Groucho Marx wrote:Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

The Comedy of Craigslist

189
SecondEdition wrote:Hello there i am looking for a cool jo bud on the down low who wants to get together for a movie night and tonigth we are watching jim carreys The Mask. No gay stuff only JO but I want white guys only and no one over my age and a big dick is a plus+++.


Yeah, nothin' gay or nothin', just two doudes jackin' off together to Jim Carrey....
tocharian wrote:Cheese fries vs nonexistence. Duh.

The Comedy of Craigslist

190
whoa...

massaged by mom? - w4m - 42
Reply to: pers-475616507@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-11, 12:26PM CST


looking for input from younger guys. i'm a physical therapist, and my son is involved in sports. growing up, i haven't thought anything about massaging him, but as he's gotten older i'm wondering if it's still appropriate. do you ever get a massage from your mother? i have some questions for you if you do.
henchmusic
hench-av
silver wonder

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