dabrasha wrote:http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/fur/567292780.html

lemur68 wrote:Prog dudes realize the only way they'll meet girls is to add one to their band.

Marsupialized wrote:Anyone here ever answer one of those fuck ads and it turns out to be someone you know?

I'm fucking around answering these twisted ads just to see if they are real chicks or not and I get a picture from one and it's a chick I work with.
She's looking to 'experiment with anal'. Tonight. With a stranger off the computer.
She's a very straight laced (at work anyway) chubby-ish girl, pretty quiet, just kinda there.

I am so tempted to use the word 'Experiment' about 40 times around her at work tomorrow, see what she does.

'Yeah, I just got this new pen...I mean, you of all people would know I'm always looking to experiment with new pens'

'Want some coffee? I did a little experimenting with some different flavors...thought you'd definitely want in on it'

Here's the deal: Me, My Millions, and Your Body. - 35

Reply to: pers-561825141@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-03, 4:23PM CST


I am an independently wealthy CEO of a tech-industry firm with an international market.

I have a condo here in Chicago, a loft in NYC, and villa in Tuscany, and land in the south of France.

I require the services of a woman, and in return for those services, for the space of one year, I will reward her with $500,000, as well as a stipend of $50,000 year for the next ten years. I can draw this all up in a contract which will be legally binding. Trust me, money is no object.

In return for this money, all I require of you is absolute obedience.

Let me make myself plain.

I have no respect for women whatsoever, nor am I interested in 'love' (which I consider to be a gross fiction), nor do I want to 'talk' with you, have you share your 'feelings' with me, have children with you, or pretend I give a damn about anything you are interested in. I'm not.

I want a woman (or women...I am open to the participation of perhaps as many as three candidates) who is physically fit,- I mean, not a fucking drop of cellulite on her-preferably with modeling experience, childless (no stretch marks), disease-free, and who knows how to keep her fucking mouth shut, to live with me as my escort for the space of that year. I don't need you to cook or clean, I have immigrants to do that for me.

You know what I need. And I need it at the VERY LEAST 3 times a day. Every day. For the entire year. if you behave yourself, I will allow you to travel with me and be seen with me. And perhaps entertain my friends as well. I will also swear not to leave any permanent markings on your person.

I will accept ONLY the responses of women who attach photos and who accept these terms without question.

Do we have an understanding? Have I made myself clear?

Good.

I will be accepting applications for the next 72 hours only only.

Marsupialized wrote:$250 will get you this monstrosity right now

Marsupialized wrote:Anyone here ever answer one of those fuck ads and it turns out to be someone you know?

I'm fucking around answering these twisted ads just to see if they are real chicks or not and I get a picture from one and it's a chick I work with.
She's looking to 'experiment with anal'. Tonight. With a stranger off the computer.
She's a very straight laced (at work anyway) chubby-ish girl, pretty quiet, just kinda there.

I am so tempted to use the word 'Experiment' about 40 times around her at work tomorrow, see what she does.

'Yeah, I just got this new pen...I mean, you of all people would know I'm always looking to experiment with new pens'

'Want some coffee? I did a little experimenting with some different flavors...thought you'd definitely want in on it'

Verbs and Nouns wrote:

Marsupialized wrote:Anyone here ever answer one of those fuck ads and it turns out to be someone you know?

I'm fucking around answering these twisted ads just to see if they are real chicks or not and I get a picture from one and it's a chick I work with.
She's looking to 'experiment with anal'. Tonight. With a stranger off the computer.
She's a very straight laced (at work anyway) chubby-ish girl, pretty quiet, just kinda there.

I am so tempted to use the word 'Experiment' about 40 times around her at work tomorrow, see what she does.

'Yeah, I just got this new pen...I mean, you of all people would know I'm always looking to experiment with new pens'

'Want some coffee? I did a little experimenting with some different flavors...thought you'd definitely want in on it'

I want to know the outcome of this.

It's hiliarious.

Marsupialized wrote:

Verbs and Nouns wrote:

Marsupialized wrote:Anyone here ever answer one of those fuck ads and it turns out to be someone you know?

I'm fucking around answering these twisted ads just to see if they are real chicks or not and I get a picture from one and it's a chick I work with.
She's looking to 'experiment with anal'. Tonight. With a stranger off the computer.
She's a very straight laced (at work anyway) chubby-ish girl, pretty quiet, just kinda there.

I am so tempted to use the word 'Experiment' about 40 times around her at work tomorrow, see what she does.

'Yeah, I just got this new pen...I mean, you of all people would know I'm always looking to experiment with new pens'

'Want some coffee? I did a little experimenting with some different flavors...thought you'd definitely want in on it'

I want to know the outcome of this.

It's hiliarious.

It didn't even cross my mind at work today, it was a very quiet low key day. She didn't look or walk any different, so I'm guessing she had no luck.