otisroom wrote:

Marsupialized wrote:

otisroom wrote:

Mandroid2.0 wrote:

Nina wrote:

steve wrote:I'd pay pretty good for a decent coffee of the type made famous by Italians and fake Italians. But not if it's deconstructed I wouldn't. Or if it has soy milk in it. Or Agave and seltzer or any of that other lame not-doing-the-obvious-for-no-good-reason crap.

How does one know if it has been "deconstructed?"

(Apologies, I am new to this "deconstructed" thing)

It's pretty much exactly what one would expect it to be-- food that is reduced to a the sum of its ingredients and arranged on the plate separately and usually with quite a bit of pretentiousness involved. Like, a BLT sandwich becomes an endive stem holding some chopped heirloom tomatoes marinaded in tarragon vinaigrette with a bacon mousse dollop next-door and then some some tiny puffed pastry topped with a poached quail egg and then...I don't know, some truffle shaving over the egg. Then it's served on a long, rectangular plate imported and you are charged $50 for the experience of eating tiny portions of little mounds of food that are representative of the original dish but presented in a "bold, new artistic manner" by some "brilliant fresh talent" of a chef who probably also studies molecular gastronomy.

That sounds horrible. My wife likes places like that and it's always a bad time for me.

Have you given any thought to drowning the woman?

Careful. She reads this thing sometimes.

big_dave wrote:Marsupialized is currently drafting a PM with the title "I know a discreet man with a boat".

Marsupialized wrote:

big_dave wrote:Marsupialized is currently drafting a PM with the title "I know a discreet man with a boat".

You do the boat thing, who knows if they'll ever find the body....you'll be going through court shit trying to get that insurance money for fucking years. No, you gotta bite the bullet it and do it in the bathtub at home. Yes there will be suspicion, but that's the name of the game. As long as you keep a low profile and stick to one story odds are you'll come out alright. Unless some random fat asshole cop decides then and there to actually start doing his fucking job you'll be fine. Even if the cops get a hard on for you for whatever reason, they are cops and cops are fucking stupid, you'd most likely walk away.
'oh how terrible, I came home from work and my darling sweet wife is drowned in the bathtub, oh I told her not to drink so much....she must have slipped and hit her head'
Cha-Ching

otisroom wrote:Your spending way too much time posting on this board and not enough time out there in the real world becoming the criminal mastermind you were born to be.

Marsupialized wrote:

big_dave wrote:Marsupialized is currently drafting a PM with the title "I know a discreet man with a boat".

You do the boat thing, who knows if they'll ever find the body....you'll be going through court shit trying to get that insurance money for fucking years. No, you gotta bite the bullet it and do it in the bathtub at home. Yes there will be suspicion, but that's the name of the game. As long as you keep a low profile and stick to one story odds are you'll come out alright. Unless some random fat asshole cop decides then and there to actually start doing his fucking job you'll be fine. Even if the cops get a hard on for you for whatever reason, they are cops and cops are fucking stupid, you'd most likely walk away.
'oh how terrible, I came home from work and my darling sweet wife is drowned in the bathtub, oh I told her not to drink so much....she must have slipped and hit her head'
Cha-Ching

Cranius wrote:You don't know me, but my wife and I want to make a baby and the other day she recommended that I submit to a 'sex regime'.