Dr. Venkman wrote:Don't drink the yellow Gatorade.

What? Why? I'm drinking it right now. Is this tour slang for pee? Or does it just make you want to pee a lot?

Actually, I think it might be orange.

tommydski wrote:

Dr. Venkman wrote:Don't drink the yellow Gatorade.

What? Why? I'm drinking it right now. Is this tour slang for pee?

don't drink out of any bottle in the van that seems to have a yellow hue to it... might be a better way to phrase that.

tommydski wrote:

Dr. Venkman wrote:Don't drink the yellow Gatorade.

What? Why? I'm drinking it right now. Is this tour slang for pee? Or does it just make you want to pee a lot?

Actually, I think it might be orange.

I'm saying that touring bands in a van make-a-the wee-wee in the large Gatorade bottles. I think if it's orange, you're OK...unless your bass player was seriously dehydrated.

Sorry, but you guys kind of sound like pussies. Deodorant? Towels? Fucking pillow?

My personal rule is I sleep on the floor even if there is a bed just so I don't get used to it. I'll shower every few days if it's convenient, but I definitely don't plan on it. I'm vegan which means I don't eat sometimes. Hunger pains are fuel for rock and beer actually gets you drunk. I'm married and don't cheat so I don't have to worry about hot 20 year olds.

How about this for a rule: Make sure every fucking thing is in the fucking van and walk around the venue to check an extra time after you are positive you remembered everything.

Also, spend all your money right away so you are not distracted by the possibility of having a good time.

I think the most important rule is:

Never try to drive overnight. Just fucking chill out. you should have realized that the drive from memphis to salt lake city was way too far and you're not gonna make that show. Marathon relay driving has killed more young musicians than I care to think about.

Also: lay down some ground rules about your bass player's stupid hats. believe me, they all have stupid hats.

chris jury wrote:Also: lay down some ground rules about your bass player's stupid hats. believe me, they all have stupid hats.

A-hem.

n.c. wrote:Sorry, but you guys kind of sound like pussies. Deodorant? Towels? Fucking pillow?

I played 200 shows a year from 1992 to 1997. What are you doing? Three day weekends? Fuck you, I am bringing a pillow and a towel.

I'm vegan

pussy.

Number one rule

Make sure every single person in your band is cool.

If you follow that rule, and never waiver from it everything will be alright always. Even when something happens or shit sucks, at least everyone is cool.
One pussy or crybaby or asshole in the mix wil spoil everything always. Even when shit's cool, there's always that asshole to have to deal with.

Life is too short, man. Way too fucking short.

odeon wrote:no heroin on tour.

7. Most sound guys are fucks, buy them a beer early on so they drop the attitude.

is it really that bad in the u.s.?

I don't know about the US.
in Australia the smaller the town the bigger the fucking PA hero.
the guys who are the worst generally have a vocal PA and refuse to let anyone touch, and if you dent a sm58 godamn you will pay.

A beer lets them know you are on there side... and its easier than fighting.

dontfeartheringo wrote:

n.c. wrote:I'm vegan

pussy.

What is up with you and bashing vegans and vegetarians?