Maker of Treats: Little Debbie
33Not Crap, but Little Debbie can't really hang with Tastykake.
Your other snack cakes, your Hostesses and what have you, they're pulling up to the stoplight and trying to psych one another out, revving the little engines (nnnnn nnnnn) in their mom's car and waiting for the light to turn green. Tastykake comes up in the outside lane in a kandy 1974 Barracuda with a fucking airplane motor under the hood (a deep visceral whubumwhubum), drops it into gear and peels out (GNNNN bbbbrrrrrrrrr) right when the light changes, while Hostess and Little Debbie gawk and drool.
Your other snack cakes, your Hostesses and what have you, they're pulling up to the stoplight and trying to psych one another out, revving the little engines (nnnnn nnnnn) in their mom's car and waiting for the light to turn green. Tastykake comes up in the outside lane in a kandy 1974 Barracuda with a fucking airplane motor under the hood (a deep visceral whubumwhubum), drops it into gear and peels out (GNNNN bbbbrrrrrrrrr) right when the light changes, while Hostess and Little Debbie gawk and drool.
Maker of Treats: Little Debbie
35japmn wrote:If you say crap you have Herpes.
Microwave 3 Cream pies for 25 seconds and put a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top.
Wait- is that a cure for herpes?
Maker of Treats: Little Debbie
36starcrunch and oatmeal cremes are my favorite...oatmeal cremes are the moist vaginas of the cookie world...
lemur68 wrote:I've always said there are two ways to guarantee getting on the news:
1) Be found hoarding 80 animals in your home.
2) Drive through a storefront.
I'm 6/80ths the way to #1.
Maker of Treats: Little Debbie
39Behind her benign smile lurks a core harder than steel:
-r
Little Debbie Big Pack Honey Buns
Ingredients: Enriched bleached flour (wheat flour, barley malt, niacin, reduced iron, thiamine mononitrate, riboflavin, folic acid) water, sugar, palm oil, partially hydrogenated soybean and cottonseed oil with TBHQ to preserve flavor, dextrose, yeast.... agar, emulsifiers (datem, mono- and diglycerides, soy lecithin), calcium sulfate, calcium propionate and potassium sorbate, ascorbic acid, azodicarbonamide, calcium peroxide, amylase enzymes, natural and artificial flavors (contains lemon), colors (annatto extract, titanium dioxide, turmeric).
-r
Maker of Treats: Little Debbie
40warmowski wrote:Behind her benign smile lurks a core harder than steel:Little Debbie Big Pack Honey Buns
Ingredients: Enriched bleached flour (wheat flour, barley malt, niacin, reduced iron, thiamine mononitrate, riboflavin, folic acid) water, sugar, palm oil, partially hydrogenated soybean and cottonseed oil with TBHQ to preserve flavor, dextrose, yeast.... agar, emulsifiers (datem, mono- and diglycerides, soy lecithin), calcium sulfate, calcium propionate and potassium sorbate, ascorbic acid, azodicarbonamide, calcium peroxide, amylase enzymes, natural and artificial flavors (contains lemon), colors (annatto extract, titanium dioxide, turmeric).
-r
For the gluten-intolerant, the wheat flour & barley malt would get them long before the heavy metals.
Hey, no corn syrup though!
tocharian wrote:Cheese fries vs nonexistence. Duh.