Back in the before times, this was a good place for discussion around sobriety, so I think it's appropriate to bump this thread from time to time. I was a pretty manageable drunk for most of my adulthood, but I come from a family of daily drinkers who kept their shit together well enough to keep a family life, good jobs, etc. A responsible alcoholic, I suppose. I told this story last year, but whatever. Everyone in my family who has sobered up has kind of the same story. Drink at night after work, get up in the morning, do your shit sober/thru a hangover, patiently wait for a reasonable time to start drinking, repeat.

Many in my family maintained this routine for years - decades even. My grandfather went into AA when he was 71 and was sober from that day forward, and my mom was almost 70 when she quit. I just accelerated to a problem earlier in life than they did. My first day sober was June 1, 2020, at 44 years old, so I just celebrated a year a few weeks ago. Went to the barber for a beard clean up and got myself a 7th tattoo to celebrate.

I have no words of wisdom, and I feel like mine is a pretty routine story, but I'll also say that I never really felt like I had a problem. I'd hear the stories of other drunks and use that as a barometer for when I had to quit - in the back of my mind I knew I had a problem for years and years, but I could always point to things that meant I was in control. I never drank at work, I never drank and drove, I never blacked out and did something awful, and for the most part, I was a happy and sleepy drunk. I was never violent, but I would pass out on the couch early in the night a lot, then wake up at 2 or so, have a quick drink and go back to sleep till the morning. I occasionally became an intolerable asshole, but even that was pretty rare. I used this as an excuse to show myself I didn't have a "real" problem. But I did - and I do still.

It's gotten to the point now that I don't really have to think about it, being sober is normal. There are situations all the time where I'm like "damn, I really miss being able to have a double IPA or a fat glass of bourbon" but I never miss it enough to cave. I tell people who are in my social circle that I'd be more offended if they changed their behavior on account of me, because this is my problem and not theirs, but that's going to get put more to the test as social living improves soon with vaccinations, etc.

Anyway, I like being sober, and the predictability that comes with it.

It's at right about a decade since I quit smoking for the final time. I don't miss it all. Good luck because I think there's truth to it being hard to quit than heroin.

I'm over the month mark now without a cigarette.

I'm not one for self help books but this one helped get me through the first week.

I'm at 11 and a half years of quitting smoking now, almost to the day. the only advice I can give is if you can make it a day, you can make it a week, and if you can make it a week, you can make it a month, then 6 months, then a year, then 2 years, and so on. Also taking up exercise is nice because it helps build your lungs back up after years of abuse. Finally, quit because you want to not because someone tells you to. If you're not ready to quit, you're not ready.

Every so often I get a craving but at this point, the idea of having a smoke is almost ridiculous to me.

Jimbo wrote: Thu Jul 01, 2021 7:43 am Finally, quit because you want to not because someone tells you to. If you're not ready to quit, you're not ready.

This is solid advice for any bad habit/addiction

^I hear you. It took 2 cancers and 2 years of sobriety to get me to go these 6 weeks without a cigarette. Sadly, I had to hit bottom to give up drinking. Did a stint in rehab, after detoxing in the hospital. Been on a steady path of sobriety AND mental health since. Hope it continues.

Go for it Jason. You got this.

Jason that is terrific. Wishing you the best on the journey.

Quickly did the math and I've been 17 days without a drink. Back as it used to be, which will be very good for me.

jason from volo wrote: Tue Jul 06, 2021 5:35 pm

Mason wrote: Tue Jul 06, 2021 4:34 pm Quickly did the math and I've been 17 days without a drink. Back as it used to be, which will be very good for me.

Awesome, keep it going.

Day 2 and so far, so good. Tomorrow will be a little more challenging as there is a "going back to the office" outing after work. I fully intend to not drink at that.

PM me if you want a #, can always check in.

The best advice I can offer is what others have said to me in the past - Don’t worry about tomorrow, or the next holiday or whatever, just get through today. If that’s too hard, get through the next hour without a drink. Or 5 minutes, just don’t drink. It’s the worrying about that big unknown future that really fucks things up, and the future ain’t here yet, so don’t think about it.

Others have said it better, but hopefully you’ll get the gist.