Have any of you all lost or shunned friends and/or family over politics in the last 8 years?
Was there a particular instance that caused you to ignore them or cut them out of your life?

I have a few relatives I've unfollowed on FB, that's about it.

zircona1 wrote: Fri Jan 19, 2024 2:13 pm Have any of you all lost or shunned friends and/or family over politics in the last 8 years?
Was there a particular instance that caused you to ignore them or cut them out of your life?

I have a few relatives I've unfollowed on FB, that's about it.

In real life, not specifically between me and others. However, there are several rifts within my extended family, my sister had a nervous breakdown and nearly stopped talking to my parents because they were considering voting for Trump, and my two best friends from college no longer speak to each other; one became a more outspoken progressive, and the other one made a hard-right turn after college. I still keep in touch with the latter, but it can be a real challenge talking to him; I try to limit conversations to topics of mutual interest.

Facebook is a different story. I use the "unfollow" feature often, even with people I actually like in real life.

zircona1 wrote: Fri Jan 19, 2024 2:13 pm Have any of you all lost or shunned friends and/or family over politics in the last 8 years?
Was there a particular instance that caused you to ignore them or cut them out of your life?

I have a few relatives I've unfollowed on FB, that's about it.

A close friend of mind back in Arizona went off the deep end with the right wing conspiracies about midway through Obama’s presidency and started sending me weird messages about how I was abetting the enemy. I reminded him that I was voting Green Party back when we were hanging out twenty to thirty years ago, and my politics hadn’t changed much since. Once Trump happened, the messages became more hostile, and I rarely engaged him. About a year ago, he went on a smear campaign on FB against myself and another mutual friend of ours, calling us elitists and carrying on about how we’re supporting the enemy. It was bizarre, especially since I rarely post anything political on FB. Turns out my friend had a bad meth problem all those years. He started posting pictures of himself with his guns, and then everything went quiet. Not sure what his status is now.

zircona1 wrote: Fri Jan 19, 2024 2:13 pm Have any of you all lost or shunned friends and/or family over politics in the last 8 years?
Was there a particular instance that caused you to ignore them or cut them out of your life?

There was once a time when I would have never given a second thought about the amount of police officers I had as friends and relatives, it was just how it was and I had quite a few-- even played in a homocore band with one as the lead singer. That all changed after the arrest of Henry Louis Gates. Online and in-person I was aggressively vocal about how disrespectful the police were, and as further traumatic incidents between citizens and law enforcement happened the angrier and louder I became. I wouldn't blame any one person for dropping me either. But more to your point about losing people due to politics within the last decade or so it's complicated.

I have a friend and this guy was literally the first friend I made on planet Earth. We grew up together, our families are close, the definition of a best friend. After I went to college we didn't see each other nearly as often but we kept in touch. The last time I physically saw him was in 1992, but we still share a bond, sorta. Later in life he married a Trumper. She and I became friends on Facebook which was a terrible idea. I had to delete/block her. My friend, who is just a hesher sweetheart requested that we not discuss politics anymore for the sake of our personal relationship. I sincerely still love the guy but cannot fathom why he loves his wife or why he supports Trump. Occasionally he will say that we should hang out but I'm terrified of what might happen. I cannot stand his wife nor can I abide by his politics. But I also cannot see him not in my life, no matter how distant we are right now.

zircona1 wrote: Fri Jan 19, 2024 2:13 pm Have any of you all lost or shunned friends and/or family over politics in the last 8 years?
Was there a particular instance that caused you to ignore them or cut them out of your life?

It’s funny, as a long time nihilist, it hasn’t really been a difficult transition. I’ve always had to smile and nod along anyways, so with the growing political gulf it’s only made my position less difficult to justify.

Is Mike Johnson actually trying to act like a legitimate Speaker of the House?

When he was originally elected Speaker, I was thinking that the government would be shut down and/or abortions would be banned in the USA by now. I know that last point is a bit of an exaggeration, but... I certainly would not have guessed that he would be swinging deals that more Democrats would be voting for than Republicans?!?

I lost a huge chunk of my family and friends when I came out as trans. Some of them I had cut out earlier due to their rabid racism and homophobia but the most depressing part was that when I came out, a lot of them just quietly stopped inviting me to stuff and talking to me altogether. A lot of them were center-liberal but had friends and family they kept that were right wing and on at least a couple occasions I was invited to something but was asked to dress differently to not make their conservative friends/family uncomfortable. Basically asking me to make myself uncomfortable to placate bigots. It got to the point where I just didn’t want to hang around them because of the company they kept. The same has happened with a lot of my found family—the number of straight, cis friends me and the three closest people in my life currently have can probably be counted on a single hand for those reasons. We have a huge queer community though which is incredible and unlike anything I’d experienced before.

It’s honestly heartbreaking how many people keep on bigoted family and friends—like you understand that the politicians they support are literally engaged in an ongoing genocide against us, right? They are literally demonizing us, openly encouraging violence against us, making policies that prevent us from getting the medical care we need, forcing us from our own homes and making us uproot our lives and communities we’ve worked so hard to build. Why not ditch them and make more queer/trans friends? We need all the help we can get and we’re marginalized and gatekept from money and opportunities and need allies to help support us. It feels like most self-proclaimed “allies” consistently choose to keep their bigoted cis straight friends over queer ones when it comes down to it.

https://newrepublic.com/article/178175/ ... -eradicate

https://truthout.org/articles/anti-tran ... me-states/

Why would I give up a single friend or family member because of politics? I'm a believer in the Twain/Carlin/MacDonald model. We can help each other more than any politician can. If you want to talk, we can talk. If you want to argue, you have to have thick skin. And even then, I'll try to be nice. Because love is more important than politics.

Well, if that family member is actively arguing for the suffering/abuse/dehumanization of your kids/sibling/close friends, etc, then their politics are a pretty good reason to end a relationship with them I'd say.

Frankie99 wrote: Sun Jan 21, 2024 7:30 am Well, if that family member is actively arguing for the suffering/abuse/dehumanization of your kids/sibling/close friends, etc, then their politics are a pretty good reason to end a relationship with them I'd say.

This really shouldn't need to be said, yet here we are. Ridiculous.