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What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:11 pm
by H-GM_Archive
Tar Baby wrote:Hi. I've been lurking and sporadically posting for the past couple of months. You have a really nice board. The threads are witty, funny, and most of all informative. However, what I haven't been able to find are any threads/lists in regard to current underground rock/noise-rock bands operating in the vein of imprints such as Touch and Go, Amphetamine Reptile, Skin Graft, etc., etc. I like to be kept abreast of new shit-rock sounds.

One album that I've been enjoying has been Todd's Purity Pledge. I also like the self-titled Functional Blackouts release from last year. What are some other current bands making obnoxious, sloppy, noisy, migraine-inducing rock?

Thanks.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:42 pm
by Marsupialized_Archive
Marsupialized wrote:Holy fucking Jesus bullshit....
CRAP!!!

Every fucking band I've been in, there's always one emotionally crippled doofus who can't so much as wipe his ass without his worthless waste of time girlfriend standing above him giving him instructions....
For those of us who wern't raised to be complete fucking pansy ass sissies when it comes to chicks and whatnot, it's real fucking annoying.
We all make real mean jokes about you for about an hour after you leave.
Grow a fucking spine and tell her no.

Now, don't get me wrong....there are situations where bringing the chicks is completely permissable, even encouraged.

If a member of the band has a cool as fuck girlfriend that everyone loves, she can come twice a month and stay for the entire duration of practice, she is allowed to bring two decent looking friends with her each time.

If the situation arises where a girlfriend of a band member has a friend who is interested in enjoying sexual intercourse at some point with a different member of the band, they can come once a month...but only untill said act is completed, at which point regular girlfriend rules go into effect.

If any girlfriend is disliked by a majority of the band she is banned forever from practice, and at shows she must be as low key as possible.

If a member of the band is married the wife/kids may be present for the first 10 minutes and the final 20 minutes of each practice, even if wife/kids are disliked by majority of the band.

If ANYONE shows up to jam, try out, audition or whatever you wanna call it with their girlfriend without a decent excuse as to why she's there, he will not be taken seriously one bit and will be made fun of for years and years.

Oh yeah, this all goes out the window is you are practicing in a member of the band's house who is married...in this situation the female head of the household gets to veto ANY other females coming around at any time for any reason. She should never be questioned on any decison she makes regarding this, trust me.

Or just be a pussy and bring your stupid girlfriend to every practice and never get anything done.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:45 pm
by El Protoolio_Archive
From 2003 in a forum that no longer exists

El Protoolio wrote:The Look No Woman Can Resist
John has it. I've seen it. I've documented it. I've studied it. I've emulated it. But it only works for John.
John left this years Tape Op party with the hottest woman in the bar. How does he do it?

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:46 pm
by DefinitelyNOTtheSWEDE_Archive
Theswede wrote:Has anybody seen this review in the new catalog? I want to get one...

The J 3000 Professional Studio Mixer by Jetron, one of the only 16 Channel large format mixers to
break the 75 dollar price barrier, is an extremely versatile and easy to use machine.
Add the many features that are not available on any mixer at any price, and you come
up with one sweet deal! I tested the J 3000 with a multitude of instruments, and, with
a little tweaking, was able to produce some excellent sounds. Please read on, and
find out what an excellent musical tool this can be!
When I first received the box, I was intimidated by the size and weight of the box. A
$75 dollar mixer couldn't possibly be as large as the packaging indicated. However,
After asking a friend to assist me with dragging the box into my house, I was
Astonished to find that it was indeed over 5 feet long, and weighed in at a whopping
637 pounds! I immediately was bowled over at what an excellent value this mixer was
Turning out to be.
After removing the packaging, I inspected the workmanship of the machine. It had a
Few minor imperfections (but for $75 dollars US, who cares?). It also had what I can only
Describe as human feces smeared over the entire machine. After a few hours of heavy
Disinfection in a hazmat suit, I was ready to roll!
First, I attempted to plug in a common XLR connector into the 16 jacks on the front of
The mixer. However, I soon realized that jacks were merely drawings. I consulted the
Manual, which stated that there should be “a lot of holes to plug the things in on the
Front of the machine. Strange terminology, but I like their style!
After consulting the manual, I did find 16 crudely machined holes, which were actually on
The bottom of the mixer, which makes operation quite difficult, if not impossible. And
Heres another hint: try never to move the machine, as the sides are made of graham
Crackers and they tend to break easily.
After an awful bought with Hepatitis, I was invited to visit the factory where the j 3000 is
Manufactured. I was surprised to learn that the company is owned and operated by babies.
Most of the factory workers are babies as well, ranging anywhere from 6 months to 2 years
Old. Very strange!!
In conclusion, the j 3000 is an excellent value, and contains bizarre and unusable features
Like a waterslide and a cancelled check.

-Brunt Torsox, Guitarist for Herringbone

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:47 pm
by Marsupialized_Archive
hench wrote:
hench wrote:long time reader, first time poster...

i'm getting ready to release my first album- looking at the various duplication places (bellwether, discmakers, etc)... i see that all of them
have this IPR form (intellectual property- no sampling without rights etc etc)...

apparently members of the IRMA (int'l recording manufacturers assn) require one to fill this out...

and of course my album contains quite a bit of unauthorized samples (in the dj shadow/dangermouse vein of things... mostly obscure, but a few quite obvious little bits and pieces).

it's not likely that i'll be able to clear any of these.

so... just how carefully are duplication places reviewing what i submit for copyright infringement? and are there places out there that would maybe turn a blind eye my way?

yr help is appreciated. thanks.


hey I don't know if this ever got answered correctly but speaking from much experience nobody gives a fuck and you'll never hear a word about samples you use unless somehow one of the tracks you used an anywhere near recognizable sample on becomes any sort of a 'hit' even in the smallest sense (Radio play, played in clubs, put on a comp that sells) then you are fucked money-wise if someone notices you didn't clear that shit, most likely.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:49 pm
by hench_Archive
Marsupialized wrote:hey I don't know if this ever got answered correctly but speaking from much experience nobody gives a fuck and you'll never hear a word about samples you use unless somehow one of the tracks you used an anywhere near recognizable sample on becomes any sort of a 'hit' even in the smallest sense (Radio play, played in clubs, put on a comp that sells) then you are fucked if someone notices, most likely.



thanks -- so far i've been fine with that whole radio play/played in clubs thing. in that it's not happening. as long as it continues to not happen, i should still be OK.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 9:47 pm
by placeholder_Archive
placeholder wrote:codeine: not crap

they are one of a handful of bands i can find no real fault with. if held at gunpoint, i'd say i could do without "cigarette machine," maybe, but that's it. i still get chills when i hear "cave-in" and "ides." aaaand they covered songs by both MX-80 sound and joy division, two other bands i'd very easily classify as "not crap."


I stand by this, but have since learned that the "Shift" key makes capital letters happen.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 9:59 pm
by ironyengine_Archive
some idiot wrote:Definitely not crap. Dude plays bass with a fury I haven't seen in most 'rock' shows, much less the standard shoegazing-at-best laptoptronica. Plus he's starting to show off his acoustic drum skills now too, there's a lot more than meets the eye to Tom Jenkinson.

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 10:04 pm
by Mama Clortho_Archive
Mama Clortho wrote:THIS IS BULLSHIT!

What did your first ever post on EA say?

Posted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 10:16 pm
by punch_the_lion_Archive
punch_the_lion wrote:Or would he like being compared to a Frenchman?