Premier Rock Forum

at least people won't try to honestly assert that Vanilla Ice is the most important artist in the last 20 years or something equally ridiculous. Sublime fans are widespread and a horrible cancer.

Vanilla Ice needs to have existed. Here's why:

--He had no talent for rapping whatsoever. He had slightly more talent as a dancer, but only slightly more. Had he been a good rapper, we'd likely be ridiculing his dancing ability right now.

--He appropriated somebody else's music in a way that added nothing inventive or creative.

--He's a pathological liar.

--He dressed in a manner that was totally ridiculous even at the time. If he had debuted in 2005, he would have worn a $75 Von Dutch trucker's cap and pants halfway down his thighs.

--His debut record sold something like 7 million copies, making him an A-list superstar practically overnight. It's truly remarkable how many people he duped with his sheer awfulness. Magazine covers, movies, constant TV coverage. I mean, does anyone think that Madonna would have solicited whoever did "Who Let the Dogs Out," "Macarena," or "Whoomp (There It Is)" for her Sex book, had they had their single hits at the right time? It's honestly breathtaking to be reminded of how enormous he was for a short time, before . . . .

--"Go Ninja, go ninja, go!" and other instances in which attached his name, in the expectation of a paycheck, to crap so crappy that even his dumbest, most gullible fans couldn't abide him. From superstar to punchline in, what, one year?

Vanilla Ice isn't just crap. He's the benchmark for undeserved fame. He pretty much set the speed record in terms of the time it took him to become famous and then face a backlash so complete and so unyielding that it destroyed his career.

Sublime was merely a band that really, really sucked.

Wood Goblin wrote:Vanilla Ice needs to have existed. Here's why:

--He had no talent for rapping whatsoever. He had slightly more talent as a dancer, but only slightly more. Had he been a good rapper, we'd likely be ridiculing his dancing ability right now.

--He appropriated somebody else's music in a way that added nothing inventive or creative.

--He's a pathological liar.

--He dressed in a manner that was totally ridiculous even at the time. If he had debuted in 2005, he would have worn a $75 Von Dutch trucker's cap and pants halfway down his thighs.

--His debut record sold something like 7 million copies, making him an A-list superstar practically overnight. It's truly remarkable how many people he duped with his sheer awfulness. Magazine covers, movies, constant TV coverage. I mean, does anyone think that Madonna would have solicited whoever did "Who Let the Dogs Out," "Macarena," or "Whoomp (There It Is)" for her Sex book, had they had their single hits at the right time? It's honestly breathtaking to be reminded of how enormous he was for a short time, before . . . .

--"Go Ninja, go ninja, go!" and other instances in which attached his name, in the expectation of a paycheck, to crap so crappy that even his dumbest, most gullible fans couldn't abide him. From superstar to punchline in, what, one year?

Vanilla Ice isn't just crap. He's the benchmark for undeserved fame. He pretty much set the speed record in terms of the time it took him to become famous and then face a backlash so complete and so unyielding that it destroyed his career.

Sublime was merely a band that really, really sucked.

beautiful.

Wood Goblin wrote:Vanilla Ice needs to have existed. Here's why:

--He had no talent for rapping whatsoever. He had slightly more talent as a dancer, but only slightly more. Had he been a good rapper, we'd likely be ridiculing his dancing ability right now.

--He appropriated somebody else's music in a way that added nothing inventive or creative.

--He's a pathological liar.

--He dressed in a manner that was totally ridiculous even at the time. If he had debuted in 2005, he would have worn a $75 Von Dutch trucker's cap and pants halfway down his thighs.

--His debut record sold something like 7 million copies, making him an A-list superstar practically overnight. It's truly remarkable how many people he duped with his sheer awfulness. Magazine covers, movies, constant TV coverage. I mean, does anyone think that Madonna would have solicited whoever did "Who Let the Dogs Out," "Macarena," or "Whoomp (There It Is)" for her Sex book, had they had their single hits at the right time? It's honestly breathtaking to be reminded of how enormous he was for a short time, before . . . .

--"Go Ninja, go ninja, go!" and other instances in which attached his name, in the expectation of a paycheck, to crap so crappy that even his dumbest, most gullible fans couldn't abide him. From superstar to punchline in, what, one year?

Vanilla Ice isn't just crap. He's the benchmark for undeserved fame. He pretty much set the speed record in terms of the time it took him to become famous and then face a backlash so complete and so unyielding that it destroyed his career.

Sublime was merely a band that really, really sucked.

Type that funky science white boy.

"Santeria" is a horrendously bad song. ("What I Got"...better. Still shitty, but the vocal isn't nearly as soul-suckingly annoying.)

Vanilla Ice is so bad that he's passed through being ironically cool because of his badness into just being bad again.

Vanilla Ice sucks harder. It's meta-suckage.

Sublime could play instruments and write songs, even if they were lousy songs.

Christopher J. McGarvey wrote:

Wood Goblin wrote:Vanilla Ice needs to have existed. Here's why:

--He had no talent for rapping whatsoever. He had slightly more talent as a dancer, but only slightly more. Had he been a good rapper, we'd likely be ridiculing his dancing ability right now.

--He appropriated somebody else's music in a way that added nothing inventive or creative.

--He's a pathological liar.

--He dressed in a manner that was totally ridiculous even at the time. If he had debuted in 2005, he would have worn a $75 Von Dutch trucker's cap and pants halfway down his thighs.

--His debut record sold something like 7 million copies, making him an A-list superstar practically overnight. It's truly remarkable how many people he duped with his sheer awfulness. Magazine covers, movies, constant TV coverage. I mean, does anyone think that Madonna would have solicited whoever did "Who Let the Dogs Out," "Macarena," or "Whoomp (There It Is)" for her Sex book, had they had their single hits at the right time? It's honestly breathtaking to be reminded of how enormous he was for a short time, before . . . .

--"Go Ninja, go ninja, go!" and other instances in which attached his name, in the expectation of a paycheck, to crap so crappy that even his dumbest, most gullible fans couldn't abide him. From superstar to punchline in, what, one year?

Vanilla Ice isn't just crap. He's the benchmark for undeserved fame. He pretty much set the speed record in terms of the time it took him to become famous and then face a backlash so complete and so unyielding that it destroyed his career.

Sublime was merely a band that really, really sucked.

Type that funky science white boy.

Word to your mother (and Faiz's mother too)

lemur68 wrote:Sublime could play instruments and write songs, even if they were lousy songs.

So can 1000 other bands that are shittier than Vanilla Ice.

Christopher J. McGarvey wrote:

lemur68 wrote:Sublime could play instruments and write songs, even if they were lousy songs.

So can 1000 other bands that are shittier than Vanilla Ice.

Name all 1000, go ahead, I bet you can't do it...

yaledelay wrote:

Christopher J. McGarvey wrote:

lemur68 wrote:Sublime could play instruments and write songs, even if they were lousy songs.

So can 1000 other bands that are shittier than Vanilla Ice.

Name all 1000, go ahead, I bet you can't do it...

Gimme some time and I will name 1000 bands shittier than Vanilla Ice.