Premier Rock Forum

My son and I have a good relationship. We have weathered the "divorce-followed-by-forced-geographical-separation" dynamic that has been our reality for the last 8 years as well as we can, and things between his mother and I are civil, with his welfare the primary motivator. He lives in Louisville and I in Portland, and I have tried to get out there as often as possible, which has been about three times a year before COVID. Had to watch his high school graduation on a shitty Zoom stream, and have not been with him in person since January of last year. I've had both of my shots, and he and my ex got their first yesterday, so hopefully in about six weeks or so I might be able to arrange a trip out. The two of us live in towns which have had a pretty intense political atmosphere recently, which has been pretty hard to reconcile with my ordinary distress at the distance between us.

Came back with a diagnosis of Bipolar. Didn't expect it, but definitely makes sense. He recommended Depakote, the thought of giving this to my 8 year old child is giving me hives.

Calum is now three weeks old. Hamish is now three years old. I went back to work a week ago and I can't remember feeling this old and tired ever before.
Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of magic moments every day but also a lot of grumbling, sniping and lots of tears (children and adults).
Hats off to parents of small children everywhere. It's a hell of a ride.

Not a dad, but my brother just had a third one. Will go visit soon. Babies are awesome.

Just remembered my Giphy account. These are a couple years old, but still pretty fun.

Kyle @ a soccer game

Jack @ Six Flags

Kyle @ Two Boots Pizza

Had the birds and bees talk with my 8 year old yesterday. His response: "So you and Mom did that? ...Twice?"

We're headed back to NYC / NJ this weekend to see some friends and I'm planning to see a pretty great show. It's an early showtime, requires mask / vax and my son has asked to go with. Any suggestions (besides hearing protection which would definitely happen) on how to help a 9 year old enjoy his first real rock show?

BrendanK wrote: Thu Dec 16, 2021 7:24 am We're headed back to NYC / NJ this weekend to see some friends and I'm planning to see a pretty great show. It's an early showtime, requires mask / vax and my son has asked to go with. Any suggestions (besides hearing protection which would definitely happen) on how to help a 9 year old enjoy his first real rock show?

I would get up as close to the stage as possible so he can hear the amps and drums without the PA, so he knows what it sounds like, and he gets to see and smell the rock up close.


My 21 year old is halfway through his sophomore year in college. Seems to be doing well. Hopefully he will get more playing time on the soccer team next fall. Has a new girlfriend who we have not met.

My 18 year old has had a very hard pandemic. He was also a soccer player, and between school soccer an travel soccer, those guys were pretty much his only friends. He made the JV team his sophomore year in HS, but tore his ACL in like the first week of practice. So he missed that entire season, and an entire year of travel soccer. Then COViD hit, the travel team disbanded, he spent an entire year either entirely at home with remote school, or going to school 3 days a week for 3 hours only. In the fall, he was still not cleared to try out because his surgery was only 11 months prior, and his surgeon was adamant about 12 months recovery time. He finally tried out this year as a senior, but did not make the team as he was too rusty and scared to hurt his knee again. He says he is fine with not playing and he is moving on, but he is completely socially isolated. He never goes out, never talks to friends on the phone, appears to have no social life at all. He is also at the age where he no longer wants to be in High School with a bunch of stupid kids.

But we visited a bunch of colleges this fall and he seems very interested in college, and moving on to the next phase of his llife. We finally found a therapist that he likes, and he seems to be relaxing a bit, he will actually talk to us at dinner. His test scores and grades are good, so he has a good shot a getting into several of the colleges he is interested in. Fingers crossed, but I think we are helping him climb out of the hole. He is very ready to leave High School and be treated like an adult (sort of) by the world.

Wow, yeah that sounds like a lot of very tough breaks for your younger son over the last couple years! It's awesome that he is seeing a therapist, who hopefully can help prepare him for moving on to college and turning into the person he wants to be there. It's so strange how that all works, I feel like I completely came out of my shell when I went away to school.

motorbike guy wrote: Thu Dec 16, 2021 8:05 am My 18 year old has had a very hard pandemic. He was also a soccer player, and between school soccer an travel soccer, those guys were pretty much his only friends. He made the JV team his sophomore year in HS, but tore his ACL in like the first week of practice. So he missed that entire season, and an entire year of travel soccer. Then COViD hit, the travel team disbanded, he spent an entire year either entirely at home with remote school, or going to school 3 days a week for 3 hours only. In the fall, he was still not cleared to try out because his surgery was only 11 months prior, and his surgeon was adamant about 12 months recovery time. He finally tried out this year as a senior, but did not make the team as he was too rusty and scared to hurt his knee again. He says he is fine with not playing and he is moving on, but he is completely socially isolated. He never goes out, never talks to friends on the phone, appears to have no social life at all. He is also at the age where he no longer wants to be in High School with a bunch of stupid kids.

But we visited a bunch of colleges this fall and he seems very interested in college, and moving on to the next phase of his llife. We finally found a therapist that he likes, and he seems to be relaxing a bit, he will actually talk to us at dinner. His test scores and grades are good, so he has a good shot a getting into several of the colleges he is interested in. Fingers crossed, but I think we are helping him climb out of the hole. He is very ready to leave High School and be treated like an adult (sort of) by the world.

You're doing great work here. I had an athletic path taken out of my hands by circumstances outside my control and it hit me really hard in so many ways. There was nothing from a family point of view that could see that, nevermind be aware enough to guide the tiller at all. I know it should just fall under "what parents do", but many don't.