I had not realised that the part of the Lido that I go to has an FKK element. I had put my rucksack down and was strolling to an appropriate place to splash off, when passing a middle aged woman pedaling water as she bronzed herself at the end of the pool a couple of things caught my eye.
Shit! Tits!
I really wish that I had not shouted that out loud. I am aghast to be reminded what a prudish little Brit I am.

Following the fine advice of some of you, I have started to try a front crawl a little more. I really must be a sight when I do this; describing my flailings to my flatmates, they have vowed to follow me with a camcorder one day, possibly to incorporate into a future art exhibit. The first time I tried the crawl this morning I spluttered back to breastroke after a mere 10m. The more embarrassing aspect was a large wave which followed in my wake. Satan knows what disaster I had inflicted on the water with my limbs. But it seems to be working; I can do this more often than last week, people are pointing to me less, and I am starting to get cramp again, which to my brilliant brain indicates that this is healthy for me.

My attention was grabbed this morning for a short while by a man performing the most aggressive backstroke that I have ever seen. I thought this a little rude, as a couple of us were having to get out of his way. What made me mad was his expression - he had the "Magnum" face from "Zoolander". So smug! His ubercool expression coupled with his violent backward propulsion had me deem his the most pretentious swimming style that I have ever seen. I felt anger towards this man. However, when he stopped after a mere five minutes, his expression reverted to normal and I felt sorry for being so petty. That is just his natural swimming face!

I fear that I was jealous of his speed. Perhaps this might be bringing out hitherto submerged aspects of my subconscious. How homo is it to admire another man's stroke?

Marsupialized wrote:I am going to start having a Monopoly night at the apartment.
I like playing Monopoly.

Who wants to play Monopoly?

We usually throw in 20 bucks each, winner gets the pot. Side bets among players are encouraged. Once we each threw in 200 bucks each. I did not win that 5 hour game.

I love Monopoly and could never get anyone to play with me. "It takes too long." Where the fuck do you have to be, doctor? On call at the Miracle Children Need Me hospital? Shut the fuck up, count your money, and don't touch the fucking top hat, because I'm always the top hat.

Ty Webb wrote:I love Monopoly and could never get anyone to play with me. "It takes too long." Where the fuck do you have to be, doctor? On call at the Miracle Children Need Me hospital? Shut the fuck up, count your money, and don't touch the fucking top hat, because I'm always the top hat.

Fuck your top hat, I'm the boot.

Stop stealing from the bank.

I never cheat. Cheaters get the battleship in the eyeball.

sparky wrote:How homo is it to admire another man's stroke?

Well, I guess that depends on what brand of cigarettes you smoke.

Saw Melt Banana last night. A few songs in and the crowd was pretty calm. I was a bit annoyed that I wasn't at the front until my friend tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I wanted to move forward. He and his friends (who I'd just met) seemed to magically cut a line directly to the front - something that would have taken me half an hour of cunningly contorting myself around people.

What I didn't realise was they were going there to start a moshpit. The two polish girls with us started freaking out and doing some bizarre (but kind of appropriate) dancing and the (significantly bigger than me) lads started hurling themselves around.

I hate moshpits because it seems like an excuse for people to hurt strangers but being with dudes that were on my side it was quite comforting. I let myself be flung around until I hit front and centre of the stage and then clung on for dear life.

From then on it was an awesome gig.

Afterwards we sat outside drinking and the band came out to their van. We cheered and waved them off in a vehicle bearing the logo FAHRTWIND*.

Then I got stranded in town in the middle of the night but that resolved itself without me having to walk 12 miles home in uncomfortable shoes.



*Google suggests that this is a german vehicle hire company.

I just ate three plums. They were on sale at the supermarket, 60p for about twelve.

I'm pleased with myself.

You're gonna be pleased with your poop, too.

I accidentally cut an old woman off at the gas pump today.

Overheated and tired after a bike ride, I was not thinking clearly when I pulled into this tiny gas station. There are four pumps on either side of the store, but from the street you can only see the first group; you have to drive around the back to see the others.

This woman is stopped next to a bunch of cars on the right, sort of behind the store and well away from any of the pumps. She doesn't really look like she's in line, but of course she is. I have to pull around her to see if there are any pumps open, and there's one. I pull in. Just as I realize what I've done, and am preparing to pull back out, she drives abreast of my car, stops (blocking me in), and yells at me through my window, calling me an asshole. She drives off before I can say, explain, or do anything.

Obviously it was my fuck-up, but thanks to her attitude, I'm conflicted as to whether I should feel really guilty, or to say "fuck her, she must've had it coming."

Called in sick to work for general shittiness. I feel really sore and my tonsils feel swollen. It hurts to swallow. Going to the Dr. at 2:30.

Got a new lady friend! She's really sweet and pretty cute. yee haw.