son of rank: the kenny

111
gcbv wrote:KENNY: Realizing you are thirty, and received a "hicky" on your neck.
JB: She's the same age, but you're 65.
JW: Thirty years old and still can't master the vaccum, tisk.

Now Kenny: Getting jumped for you candy on Halloween.
(for my own sentimenal reasons, you may also including losing your favorite pillow case as a result, but that's optional.)

son of rank: the kenny

115
tmidgett wrote:now kenny:
crossing your legs in a restaurant booth and getting someone's old chewing gum on the knee of your pants leg

just better = the guy in the stall next to you is repeatedly flushing the toilet mid-shit in a failed attempt to cover up his bodily noises

just worse = getting a whiff of someone else's puke


Kenny Lofton:

you are at a baseball game and the peanut vendor has a serious lisp - such that each time he yells "peanuts, get your peanuts" it sounds like he is saying "penis, get your penis"

son of rank: the kenny

116
stackmatic wrote:

Kenny Lofton:

you are at a baseball game and the peanut vendor has a serious lisp - such that each time he yells "peanuts, get your peanuts" it sounds like he is saying "penis, get your penis"


just better: an old woman w/ an incredibly foul mouth
just worse: yr one friend who still hilariously instructs people to talk to his hand


kenny: having a head huge/tiny body

son of rank: the kenny

117
stackmatic wrote:you are at a baseball game and the peanut vendor has a serious lisp - such that each time he yells "peanuts, get your peanuts" it sounds like he is saying "penis, get your penis"

Just Better: A ballpark vendor who, in fact, sells penis
Just Worse: Having Moises Alou as the peanut vendor in your section of the ballpark

Kenny: Carol Channing singing "Hello, Giants!" and "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch of Opening Day 2004 at SBC Park in San Francisco.

son of rank: the kenny

118
My First Kenny:


The Kenny: huge head, tiny body

JB: Kind of big head, kind of small body, so it's only noticeable from a distance

JW: huge bald head, tiny furry body


Kenny this:

sexy stranger's boob brushes against your elbow in a crowded public place (such as rock concert or post office during christmas season)

son of rank: the kenny

119
michaeltheangryrussian wrote:Kenny this:

sexy stranger's boob brushes against your elbow in a crowded public place (such as rock concert or post office during christmas season)


JB: It's on purpose cause she also put a hand on your lower back and smiles.
JW: It's a man's boob, or "moob" or "mosom" as I like to call em
It still isn't bad if it's TRULY "sexy" or yer into it.

Kennifer Aniston:
The thrill of taking out a parking meter with a baseball bat.

son of rank: the kenny

120
The thrill of taking out a parking meter with a baseball bat.


j.b. shooting out streetlights with a bb gun

j.w. placing metal trashcan lids at strategic intervals across a street so that it appears possible to avoid them all but in fact is not

Kenny: Carol Channing singing "Hello, Giants!" and "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch of Opening Day 2004 at SBC Park in San Francisco.


j.b. billy corgan singing a never-give-up version of 't.m.o.t.t.b' as the cubs were blowing the second of two straight games in the 2003 nlcs

j.w. a competent but really really slow national anthem

kenny this?

udo dirkschneider

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