Most embarrassing moments in your rock music education

171


I saw Duran Duran Duran at NuMusic in Stavanger a couple of Saturdays ago, and I really didn't like them/him. The music struck me as intensity for Ritalin kids - there was no construction to the music, just constant assault. Dull.

A few stages on in this direction, they'll be simulating our being shot repeatedly in the face. And someone will still create a remix which'll involve Paris Hilton masturbating over Christ in the background.

Most embarrassing moments in your rock music education

177
Over a decade ago I played in a terrible band. The drummer was a chemist who brewed beer in his kitchen - whiched dubbed as our practice space. The guitar player was Jimmy Hendrix redux, but blacker and about 3 feet taller. We had the looks, but the music was out of control. No one sang, we just jammed for hours. Che (Hendrix) was by far way ahead of me and the drummer in skills, let alone ideas.

But, that wasn't embarrassing. What was embarrassing was that I met this dude at guitar center. I was trying to learn how to play slap bass and I was playing like I had ADD. Che thought that was funny so he wanted to write music around it.

Most embarrassing moments in your rock music education

179
I was going to see Gauge at the Metro. I was a Junior in highschool and working for a Zine a friend of mine published. She kept pronouncing their name as "Gouge" and since I never heard of them before (this was at their height of popularity), I accepted that as the correct way to say their name.

Before the show, I bumped into a dude I knew in one of the bands opening up for them and he asked who I was there to see. I said, "Gouge," as though I was their biggest fan.

Most embarrassing moments in your rock music education

180
During the lost weeks after my Final exams, I found myself near stoned senseless at a friend's place listening to a mean Richie Hawtin record, for which I invented the genre label "H G Wells Spacecraft Music". For some reason, the bastards found this funny.

Same record, a little later:-

Me: What's that?

Friend #1: You what?

Me: The vocal line. What's the lyric?

Friend #2: I can't hear a voice.

Me: Listen.

Three very stoned students lean towards a speaker in an exaggerated fashion. Faces screwed up in concentration. Perhaps twenty seconds pass in this fashion.

Friends #1 & #2: HAHAHAHA! etc

Me: Oh.

It was a bass line. After they stop laughing.

Friend #2: Mark, what was the voice saying to you?

Me: Love Your Parents.

Fucking cannabis.

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