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On Facebook: "Two shay" They were going for "Touché"

Otto Parts wrote:Typo: recent job applicant's resume said she had done "consluting."This is funny.

From FB, dude I grew up with but not my FB friend:"I'm so close to unfollowing some friends. I can't take the constant barrage of political crap. There's a few I've already unfriended cause I couldn't take seeing them being such Hippocrates."

I can't remember if I've already posted about this. My girlfriend has a coworker who spits them out on a near daily basis. What follows is but a brief selection of emails my girlfriend has sent me over the past few years. Some of them are odd pronunciations or odd turns of phrase rather than malapropisms and I've tried to leave out the more common ones (e.g.-for all intensive purposes).was complaining about something and said it would be the œlife of her is talking about Uber (which she had never heard of until last week when [coworker] used it) and keeps calling it You-ber. big honcho M-prop asked [coworker] if he was having œtrouble sustaining himself instead of œrestraining .A few hours later she said œand you pursued to tell him ¦ instead of œand you proceeded to tell him ¦ trying to say œspecifically said œpacifically Referred to someone as a œdin wit œWe re in shit s creek œHere arc e see How malaprop pronounced hierarchy.Upon me telling her that I was waiting to do something for a before I could run an accurate report: œThat s fine- we may as well wait and give them the whole schlemiel Talking to her boyfriend about preparing pork chops: œTake the box of planko bread crumbs out of the cupboard. Planko. It s in a yellow box. Top shelf. pronounced vegan as œveggin .[Coworker] accused some company of jerking us around. M-prop was responding to him and said œNo, I don t think they re jerking us off. œi-tablet Was just checking in with the two women she oversees: œI want to make sure we re on the same boat. And my absolute personal favorite: œIf I get advantageous I ll bring in pancakes for everyone.

Clyde wrote:I can't remember if I've already posted about this. My girlfriend has a coworker who spits them out on a near daily basis. What follows is but a brief selection of emails my girlfriend has sent me over the past few years. Some of them are odd pronunciations or odd turns of phrase rather than malapropisms and I've tried to leave out the more common ones (e.g.-for all intensive purposes).was complaining about something and said it would be the œlife of her is talking about Uber (which she had never heard of until last week when [coworker] used it) and keeps calling it You-ber. big honcho M-prop asked [coworker] if he was having œtrouble sustaining himself instead of œrestraining .A few hours later she said œand you pursued to tell him ¦ instead of œand you proceeded to tell him ¦ trying to say œspecifically said œpacifically Referred to someone as a œdin wit œWe re in shit s creek œHere arc e see How malaprop pronounced hierarchy.Upon me telling her that I was waiting to do something for a before I could run an accurate report: œThat s fine- we may as well wait and give them the whole schlemiel Talking to her boyfriend about preparing pork chops: œTake the box of planko bread crumbs out of the cupboard. Planko. It s in a yellow box. Top shelf. pronounced vegan as œveggin .[Coworker] accused some company of jerking us around. M-prop was responding to him and said œNo, I don t think they re jerking us off. œi-tablet Was just checking in with the two women she oversees: œI want to make sure we re on the same boat. And my absolute personal favorite: œIf I get advantageous I ll bring in pancakes for everyone. Just got a new one right now:Conglomerate all the reports.

I love these things but I wonder how many of them are possibly from ESL speakers, people who acquired the language later in childhood or adulthood and might have gotten some wires crossed.Often enough I am forced to note with chagrin and more than mild horror that I have absolutely been mangling an idiom in German for years. Maybe someone is compiling them somewhere, would serve me right.

"The Sixteenth Chapel"

Clyde wrote:Just got a new one right now:I would follow this Twitter account.

"i-tablet."I love this one.

I have a Korean friend who says things like "they charge arm and leg" or "he drive like bat from hell." Some English idioms are so much better when slightly mangled.