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Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:33 pm**

Rimbaud III wrote:I could really do with a massage and a dong.

You know it's always only a ghost-phone call away, Rimbaud.

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:41 pm**

Claytron wrote:Oh, gosh. You really summed it up, didn't you?

I've heard better from a six year year old. Very recently. Sad fact is, blunderbuss, you just don't know me, and my own reputation is also, shall we say, "rock solid." Your "words" are meager, oh, I dunno, "trinkets" to me. Digestible ones. Also pusillanimous ones. Who's the coward here, anywho? Step, and I'll smack your ass to the floor. And you will shrink like the desert flower.

You really think you got me best of all, right? Of all the hundreds or thousands of people who've "gotten" me over the last couple of decades? I'll bet you even "think" you "know" me. Some people really are infinitely stupid. Buddy - as I see it, I'm happier than you, all the time, most apparently.

I don't have to "weigh in" on every little thing online all day. I get shit done, I'm incredibly bright, and I'm not a snob. Also, I enjoy eating. But it ain't my job to prove anything to you. Who do you think you are, anyway? Albini? Since you mentioned twats. Er, I'm sorry, credit-stealing hacks. I'm free and clean. And I also love t-shirts. Leave them out of this.

So, here's the deal: all you guys with your thousands of posts can have a real blast. I'm blasting off to get more work done after I finish chewing you out. I hardly spend anytime online at all. Yours is not the first hornet's nest I've stirred, and possibly not the last. No promises. Who knows? Live abortions might come into play at some point, I haven't decided to do that before I tackle Top Secret Covert Project C. I am so deliriously happy, all the time, it disturbs me.

I hang out outside in the sunshine, eating well, petting the kitty. Making plans. Your grandkids will worship me. Man, do I love eating, and watching movies with my friends, and of course I do have too many. I could keep on being this happy for the rest of my life. I am impenetrable, and a rock upon which you shall build a new exoskeletal foundation. I am the Alpha and Omega.

It was I who taught you how to talk, and I who shall rend your thoughts. I imploded the Heavens. You only waste your own time, Mr. 8 Billion Posts. I am living a life you can't begin to understand. But it is a life that the world shall remember. Infamy and a hatred for all that is real. Or at least on Saturdays.

You hear me? Beat it, kid. You don't know what you're up against. I just break hearts, can't mend 'em.

I can not live for you.

I just heard your name for the first time, had to look you up and couldn't care less about anything you've done so far.
I also can't think of one quality i dislike more in a person than a self-exalting fake beatnik that spend all of his time and money on himself.
and your friend's guitars, they suck.

Wait a minute....are you Ayn Rand?

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:48 pm**

Jeremy wrote:Wait a minute....are you Ayn Rand?

Close but no guitar (LOLZ)

ClaytRon is Lars Ulrich

I can't believe we didn't notice it before

Read all his posts back in a Lars Ulrich voice, it all makes so much sense

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:48 pm**

otisroom wrote:Mash-ups do suck. Layering two records someone sweated over, nudging them back and forth until they stop rubbing hard enough to make you queasy. That's your art? That's a bucket of horse piss!

Then you get sued and become infamous for it. That's your claim to fame?

How does one make money off something like that anyways?
Do people pay you to stop?

doug i agree with you almost completely. but that girl talk shit was pretty cool the first couple of times i heard it. unless claytron is girl talk.

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:52 pm**

If Fred is pragmatic he will host an Open House for forum members.

And maybe we can get Hot Doug to make make The Claytron, a combination of duck and lobster.

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 12:56 pm**

DazeyDiver wrote:doug i agree with you almost completely. but that girl talk shit was pretty cool the first couple of times i heard it. unless claytron is girl talk.

Not only that, but Gregg's a great performer and a good guy--also hilarious. This doesn't sound like him at all.

(Full disclosure: I was on tour with Girl Talk a few years ago, and a bunch of my photos ended up in The Night Ripper...though Gregg still owes me a copy.)

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 2:05 pm**

busbus wrote:
Yngwie Einstein wrote: He already said he is a mash-up artist. Doesn't that automatically disqualify his musical opinion..?

Yes

Yes. Again.

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 2:06 pm**

It is with no small amount of relief that I discovered that "Claytron" is NOT my friend who lives in Colorado and is also a producer and engineer.

I would have had to catch a plane and do an intervention, and no one wants that.

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 2:12 pm**

Claytron wrote:I'm paying rent in both Chicago and Denver, where I live in a house and a 10,000 sq. ft. live / work space, respectively, and enough bars employ me that I'm not too worried about the duck, reindeer, or gravlax blancmange. Thanks, but I've never been homeless. Or a child molester. Also, I love analog.

How many of you can afford to live in two cities? Lusus naturae. Really, do try to get out of the house already. All this presuming to know the first thing about me is making me dizzy.

C'mon guys, isn't it obvious who Claytron is?

Posted: **Mon Oct 15, 2007 2:14 pm**

This thread needs more Venn diagrams.

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