I was at a department store once and you know those beds they have, to display the sheets and blankets they have for sale? They are kinda like half sized beds just to give you an idea of what the sheets look like...
Well, I ran full blast at one and jumped as high as I could into the air...I am sailing through the air thinking about the soft, comfortable landing I am about to make onto the bed...I saw myself doing some kind of stuntman roll off of it, all in one smooth move....just impress the heck out of everyone.
Well, turns out those beds are not really beds, they are made out of hard plywood with nails sticking out of it to hold the sheets in place.
Later that evening, in the emergency room everyone had a nice laugh while I got 7 stitches in my arm.

otisroom wrote:Kenny vs Spenny- Humiliation - the breath in the face routine.

I laugh uncontrollably during just about any episode of Kenny v. Spenny. I know I probably shouldn't like it so much but I can't help myself. The "Who can eat the most meat" episode is the reason they invented tv.

For the uninitiated. NSFW due to language.

Also, during their coverage of the New Hampshire primary, CNN's Dana Bash, referring to a scene pictured below from John McCain's 2000 primary victory, uttered this unbelievable quote:

“confetti everywhere, and then somebody handed him a, uh, a Darth Vader stick.”

I've been laughing about that one for days.

burun wrote:

Colonel Panic wrote:Usually when watching Xavier: Renegade Angel. That show is so unfunny and annoying.

I fixed your post, because nobody can possibly think that show is anything but crap.

ERawk and I get a kick out of it. But then there really is no accounting for taste, right?

Marsupialized wrote:I was at a department store once and you know those beds they have, to display the sheets and blankets they have for sale? They are kinda like half sized beds just to give you an idea of what the sheets look like...
Well, I ran full blast at one and jumped as high as I could into the air...I am sailing through the air thinking about the soft, comfortable landing I am about to make onto the bed...I saw myself doing some kind of stuntman roll off of it, all in one smooth move....just impress the heck out of everyone.
Well, turns out those beds are not really beds, they are made out of hard plywood with nails sticking out of it to hold the sheets in place.
Later that evening, in the emergency room everyone had a nice laugh while I got 7 stitches in my arm.

I just read that...

AlBStern wrote:Also, during their coverage of the New Hampshire primary, CNN's Dana Bash, referring to a scene pictured below from John McCain's 2000 primary victory, uttered this unbelievable quote:

“confetti everywhere, and then somebody handed him a, uh, a Darth Vader stick.”

I've been laughing about that one for days.

This made me laugh, and then I realized that it's totally Yoda's lightsaber, and then I laughed even harder imagining McCain as Yoda.

My sister got me season 1 of Girls Next Door for Christmas. It is so so bad and so stupid that I can't help but belly laugh at almost every episode. Between the super stupid one, Kendra, laughing and the old one, Bridget, with her cat trying to keep it fluffy I just can't stop.

i was watching c-span and someone phoned in after the debate or primary, i can't recall which, and said, after a few sentences of introduction that he was a supporter of mike huckabee, who would be standing up against "cornholing faggots" or something like that. i may have heard him wrong, but i swear that's what he said. he was removed from the air immediately with full composure held by the host.

This wasn't the last time I had a laugh attack, but it killed me when I saw it. Not so much the original comment as the follow-up.

Ty Webb wrote:

Ty Webb wrote:Anyone giving Free a CRAP should turn in their guitar and install a mechanical vagina. You are a pussy robot.

NOT CRAP

On another note...

Jesus cirrhotic christ, how hammered was I when I wrote that? What?!

i was at band practice the other day and as this particular spot is crowded with bands you often get to hear some tired, played out bullshit.

so, this guy a few spaces down is just shredding. weedly weedly weedly diddily diddily woooo-oow. all he's doing is shredding. not playing any recognizeable patterns or song parts, it'll start on some chugging chords, never repeat them, and then tear ass into shredding for a few minutes. over and over and over.

first i start making fun of him by adapting the shred pose (benadrian has a picture of him in said stance with someone's ibanez iceman.) then i make like we're gonna run through our next song while i'm standing like this, "ready?" i ask. the drummer counts off, "1,2,3...shred!" and i laugh my ass off.

then i wonder what this not seen but heard shredder looks like. i say, what if you walked over and it's just a guy looking very serious, like not rocking out at all, while shredding and wearing a clown suit. then i imagine a guy doing this exercise not for fun or amusement but by compulsion and he's wearing sweatpants, loafers, a golf shirt, balding, wearing glasses. pretty much george costanza shredding. then the guitar player says, "what if it's like a 10 year old girl?"

i lost it.

i wonder what this guy looks like.

david bowie in extras - "see his pug-nosed face" song. funniest thing I have seen EVER.