Once upon a time there were three Indians: the father, Geronowitz, the mother, Pokeyenta, and the daughter Minnie-Horowitz. One day Minnie-Horowitz came home and said to Pokeyenta, "Mamma, I want to get married''.
Says Pocayenta, "Good, it's about time. You're already an old maid, sixteen years old; who is the groom?''
Says Minnie-Horowitz, "Oy, Mamma. Have I met a man! Strong and handsome, smart and noble!''
"And what is his name?''
"He's called Sitting Bullvon.''
"And what kind of family does he have?''
"Oy, he has a great family; his father, Meshuggenah Horse, is the great chief of all of the Shvartz-fuss tribe.''
Says Pocayenta, "Good! I feel like having a great wedding - Oy, oh no!''
"What is it?''
"I have a problem.''
"What is the problem?''
"The teepee is not big enough to hold all of the wedding guests - all of the Shvartz-fuss, and the Shmohowks, and all the rest.''
Pocayenta screams to Geronowitz, "Geronowitz, get off your tuchess and go kill me a buffalo.''
Says Geronowitz, "What do you need a buffalo for?''
"With the meat of the buffalo I can make a great buffalo tzimmes, and with the hide I can enlarge the teepee, and I can invite the entire world to the wedding.''
So Geronowitz goes. A day passes, two days, three days, and no Geronowitz. A week later, Geronowitz comes home empty-handed.
"SHLEMIEL! Where is my buffalo?'' screams Pocayenta.
"You and your buffalo tzimmis, to Hell with them both!''
"Why? What happened?''
"The first day I saw a buffalo, not good enough for the tzimmes. not big enough for the teepee. The second day I saw another buffalo, big enough but with a rotten hide, an ugly buffalo; the third day I saw yet another and it was clean, beautiful, big --a perfect buffalo!''
"So? What then?''
"What then? I went to skin the buffalo, I looked in my bag, and you know what? I brought my dairy tomahawk!''
(funnier in
the original Yiddish)