tmidgett: 500
BBonds: 659
Barry Bonds is one of the five greatest baseball players ever. He might even be the greatest. I watched Bonds hit a dramatic, game tying three-run home run off of Roy Oswalt last night. It was very exciting, and I enjoyed it.
Here's the point: Dramatic, game tying three-run home runs are all that any person can ask of Barry Bonds. It brings me enormous pleasure to watch him play the game of baseball. He is The Best. However, some people try to discount his achievements by talking about anything other than his performance on the field. Steroids? Are you fahgina kidding me? This non-description "steroids" covers a billion different type of performance-enhancing agents. Steroids has the same non-descriptive tenor as the term "drugs" when used to describe everything from caffeine to heroin. "Steroids" is such a non-descriptive term that it makes the person using it look foolish to me. So Barry Bonds built himself into a monster. Who cares? All I care is that he did so in a way that does not put himself at future risk, which to me doesn't seem likely considering his health and performance at forty years of age and his ridiculous exercise/stretching/nutrition routine.
Even more ridiculously, people call him "mean" or "self-absorbed". That's just absurd. Anyone who expects decorum from professional athletes is a fool. In fact, I like the fact that he is a scowling, menacing black man who walks around with a severe chip on his shoulder. He owes NOTHING to the fans and the media except his bat and glove. Stay that way, Barry, and don't ever devolve into a Stepin Fetchit clown like George Foreman, Charles Barkley or Sammy Sosa, three one-time bad asses who are now jokey little pitchmen.
I also like the fact that he did not get along with Jeff Kent, his former SF Giants teammate. Jeff Kent is a
lying redneck.
NOT CRAP!!!
tmidgett wrote:I'd like to thank my godfather, for showing me what it means to be a semi-professional typer, and my father, who typed hard day in and day out, despite never getting the respect he deserved as a typer.
This joke is funny Willie Mays/Bobby Bonds joke. Salut, tmidgett, for funny joke of baseball.