Warning signs of really bad bands
Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 6:01 pm
Over ~15 years of seeing bands consistently I've developed a little mental cheat sheet of visual cues that indicate that I am about to see a really bad band. Of course this only applies to bands about which I know nothing. It's gotten to the point where (sadly) I can tell how much a band is going to blow before they play a note. A lot of you probably have bad-band-radar too. So help me fill out the list. The Big Three in my experience are:
1. Drum racks. Whenever I see a drum rack, I immediately understand that it is 99.6% likely that the drummer can't play the fucking drums one lick. Drum racks, which are heavy, bulky, and inconvenient, are purchased exclusively by gear-obsessed people who spend more time polishing cymbals than practicing. Racks = impending suck.
2. Banners. Bands playing in front of a large banner bearing their name and/or "logo" cannot possibly be good. This is science.
3. Crate amps. Crate are shit. At least Peavey Bandits usually indicate poverty. Crate amps indicate poor taste.
Honorable mention: "Explorer" guitar bodies. I suppose someone's going to cite a person who plays one and makes great music, but in my experience Explorer = some serious Butt Rock is on the way.
Now. Go.
1. Drum racks. Whenever I see a drum rack, I immediately understand that it is 99.6% likely that the drummer can't play the fucking drums one lick. Drum racks, which are heavy, bulky, and inconvenient, are purchased exclusively by gear-obsessed people who spend more time polishing cymbals than practicing. Racks = impending suck.
2. Banners. Bands playing in front of a large banner bearing their name and/or "logo" cannot possibly be good. This is science.
3. Crate amps. Crate are shit. At least Peavey Bandits usually indicate poverty. Crate amps indicate poor taste.
Honorable mention: "Explorer" guitar bodies. I suppose someone's going to cite a person who plays one and makes great music, but in my experience Explorer = some serious Butt Rock is on the way.
Now. Go.