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WTF? From what I gather, this Johnny is a real tool. He's always buyin' a pawn shop guitar and makin' it in rock 'n' roll on only a wing and a prayer. Or drivin' in his fast car and then rockin' and rollin'. Maybe he's barely gettin' by, with only his best girl and the power of rock 'n' roll as his salvation. Wasn't that horrible song "Jukebox Hero" about him? It wouldn't surprise me. How about that other awful thing that goes "Don't you know that you are a shooting star?". What crap. Thanks a heap, Johnny, for inspiring these crap songs by livin' your rock 'n' roll dream. I'm glad songs aren't being written about this jerk so much nowadays.

Off the top of my head, here are a few notable exceptions:

Suicide: "Johnny"
Mission of Burma: "The Ballad of Johnny Burma"
Devo: "Come Back Jonee"
X: "Johny Hit & Run Pauline"
Bruce Springsteen: "Johnny 99"

There are probably more (and no, "Johnny B. Goode" is not one of them, unless it's the Sex Pistols' version). Still, Johnny, you are CRAP.

Give Johnny a break, willya? He's obviously got a lot on his plate, so let him dream a little.

also: "Ack, Ack, Ack" by the Urinals..."Johnny took his gun/and went ACK ACK ACK"

Not Crap dude's just trying to keep busy

...and there's Jonathan Richman's "Hippy Johnny"...

"He's always stoned- never straight..."

(polishes nails)

N/C

Johnny inspired Poe's "Angry Johnny".

For that alone, Johnny must hang.

Of course, Jack (i.e., a nickname for John) is also an offender, as evidenced by Poe's "Trigger Happy Jack (Drive By A Go-Go)".

These are serious crimes, Johnny/Jack.

Serious, serious crimes.

johnnyshape wrote:(polishes nails)

YOU!

television, 'little johnny jewel.' 'he has no decision / he's just trying to tell a vision.'

and the johnny that gets buttraped in the song 'land' by patti smith. '[some other kid] drove it deep inside [johnny].'

those might be johnny's peaks as a muse. i'm not sure he was in an enviable situation in either song.

X: "Johnny Hit & Run Pauline"

Johnny Cash: "The Rebel--Johnny Yuma"

Patti Smith Group: "Land" ("the boy looked at Johnny...")

"Johnny B. Goode"

Modern Lovers: "I'm Straight"

Devo: "Come Back Jonee"

Johnny Horton: "Johnny Reb"

also:

David Bowie: "John, I'm Only Dancing"

Jimmy Dean: "Big Bad John"

as for jack, well, on one hand you have jumpin' jack flash, whom i admire, and also the jack who is to 'hit the road,' whose situation i do not admire but who has inspired a fine song.

but on the other hand, you have jack and his spank diane, whom i do not fault for inspiring a terrible song by j.c. mellencamp. 'hang onto sixteen / as long as you can?!?!?!' i had a pretty good time in high school, and i was thrilled to let go of sixteen. this song, she is retarded, and maybe you can hold this against jack somewhat.