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I just got through watching this 3 hour ego stroking, masturbatory cock rock fest. Did anyone else notice the blatant lies fed to the viewing audience? For instance, they numbered the days, on day like 357 Lars had short cropped blonde hair, on day 377 he had long brown hair, then on day 385 he was back to the cropped blonde. It seems to me this whole movie was made after the record and the rehab stunt were complete, and it was just a tool to sell more records and try to gain back some of the audience that has left. It just came off like one big advertisement.

I probably would never have bothered with seeing it, but I heard Hetfield on Terri Gross and "Fresh Air" (NPR) a few weeks back and he seemed genuinely sincere, I guess good actors can play any role.

About an hour into this crap I realized how fake it was. then Mustaine came on and it just left me amazed that anyone would buy into this slop. Come on Mustaine had tears in his eyes. Fuck, peace sells? My whole teenage metal years where for what? Crap. They should all get on Zoloft and just give up the rock thing.

The few things I did enjoy were , the Mustaine segment, Lars in a robe that was monogrammed, and any scene with Bob Rock. Just because he is such a worthless turd that it amazes me he can even pronounce the word Metallica. He was even wearing a St. Anger baseball hat 300 days before they decided on a name for the album. I loved the shots of the pro tools gigantic monitor. Being someone who makes loop based music and samples my guitar parts and uses drum loops, I was kind of amazed they would show the world that the whole record was made with samples and loops. There was even a scene where Lars was telling the software user to move certain kick drum one shots to a different spot in the song. I know that this is trivial, but when I think of heavy metal, loops and samples just don't figure into the equation. I understand that 98% of major records are done this way, but damn it just sucks they pretend to be songwriters and musicians. It sucks even more that millions of people buy this shit, and a band like The Jesus Lizard break up. It's just not fair, but I guess if life where fair I would get to punch each member of metallica square in the ball sack, then shove This piece of crap DVD up Bob Rocks ass.

So after 20 years of saying this, now I am more confident then ever to repeat it. Slayer is 100 times the band metallica could ever hope to be. Maybe Slayer uses loops and Pro Tools also, but at least they don't advertise it to the world that the are too lazy to record a song as a band, all the way through. 4 guys in a room banging out the riffs.

I know that most of the members of this board probably already know this and noticed the same things I did, I just had to vent this. These guys have been blow hard ego maniacs since 1989. Sorry for the long winded rant, I just had to complain to someone else other than my wife. She has always hated them now I completely understand why. My wifes favorite rock band is The Jesus Lizard so i guess I should have respected her opinions earlier. She laughed at me when I picked it up at Hollywood video, and she will probably be poking fun at me for the next few weeks for sitting through the whole thing, I may even watch the extras now. What could possibly be on the extras? Different monogrammed robes for Heffner Ul"Rich"? Or maybe more shot of 50 year old supposed rockers crying about how much they love each other?

I am eagerly awaiting the Shellac DVD. With group hugs, and David Yow as the counselor, and Moby clicking away on the software sampling Todds drums. It could be amazing. I see Steve as the rehab candidate and Bob as Ul"RICH" and Todd would be the Hammett character. Because he is so in touch with his feelings. I will say throughout the movie Hammett was the only one I could remotely tolerate. Even though he needs to do something with that hair. Just cut it man, shave it off or something, it is so thin on top it looks ridiculous.

OK, I am finished now. Sorry again for the long post. Hope I didn't offend any Metallica die hards. Wake up, buy a Slayer record.

Oh yeah, Lars really can't play drums. Todd Trainer could play turds with dildos as sticks better in a coma.

Ok, now I am really finished.

haha, sounds like an amazing movie!

But really, do you think Slayer are any better than Metallica? They have a cheesy gimmick and the members are total fucking idiots. It's like, I want to like Slayer, but I just can't take them seriously.

Last week my house mate bought "some kind of moster" (the metallica doc) and insisted i should sit down with him and watch it. I thought fine, i have grown up with my friends listening to them and even tryed to rock out to them a few drunken times at rock clubs, but i really didnt know what i had gotten myself into.

Not only did it go on for WAYYYYY to long. nearly 3 hours i think, but it was the weirdest, must lets have a contest on how big our egos and dicks can get doc i think ive ever witnessed. I think it should be put in the comedy section of every video store. I was in fits of laughter cause it was so bad. Also from the start you could tell it was complete bullshit. Everything from the way they acted to the stupid numbering of days were all completely wrong.

I think everyone should at least watch it for its comedy value and realise that underneath all that metal riffich is a group of complete idiots who are such mummys boys that they cant even do anything without some fake theropist to hold their dicks while they go toilet

I too hope i havent hurt any metallica fans, but come on they arent that good really

Lyn x

ticdouloureaux wrote: Todd Trainer could play turds with dildos as sticks better in a coma.

Wow! Will this be on the Shellac DVD?

(Provisional release date August 2012.)

Best thing about Some Kind of Monster:

In the bonus DVD, there is footage of Kirk Hammett going to traffic school. To make matters worse, the guy actually goes to the head of the class and sings some horrible song he wrote about traffic laws. It is beyond terrible. Go watch it now. Priceless. It is easily the most embarassing thing I've seen this year.

Salut, Kirk Hammett! You have no good sense or shame! Jackass!

I've watched "some kind of monster" twice now, and here are my notes:

1. As a film about Metallica, it does not come close to the baffling and surreal beauty of "A year and a half..."

2. I found myself, on the second viewing, actually thinking of James Hetfield as a human being, trying to deal with years and years of bullshit. I was very impressed that he had decided to clean up and think about his loved ones, instead of blowing out his brains or keep going to Russia on his kid's birthday. I found him to be sincere about his actions, and that is respectable.

3. The pure irony of three guys in anger/blame management constantly venting their hurt and frustration on the GUY WHO QUIT THE BAND BECAUSE THEY WERE PICKING ON HIM is pretty priceless.

4. At one point, it hit me that Lars Ulrich, as a musician/drummer, is a complete piece of shit. I know...it took me this long to finally pass the ultimate judgement. The fact that the guy nit-picks through dozens of snippets of drum tracks to create a "master" is, as a musician and engineer, the most offensive tactic in the face of talented, hard-working people who strive to create the best performance in the studio in REAL TIME.

5. The sweaters of the Therapy Guy are astounding.

Hands down, the best comedy of 2004.

I concur with the idea that the movie does, in fact, evoke some sympathy for the individuals involved, but not in the way that they intended. I feel bad for them in the sense that they have been so far removed from reality for such an extended period of time - a function of having consciously chosen to surround themselves with "industry" people, toadies, and hangers-on - that they're really just emotionally incapable of handling just about anything. 25 years of dealing mostly with groupies, alcoholics, and people like Bob Rock would probably leave you without a moral compass too. Lars Ulrich thinks piecing drum tracks together with Pro Tools is OK because he has surrounded himself with people who think so. He may never have met anyone who told him otherwise. It's sad.

That said, they did it to themselves. So, fuck'em.

I do like Slayer more than Metallica, yes. I didn't say they weren't retards. I can just tolerate them a bit more. Not a big bit, just a little bit. It was said in jest. It was my feeble attempt at comedy.

ticdouloureaux, i think you're taking it too seriously.

really, i'm kind of baffled that anyone here approached this as anything other than comedy.

too many beers so i missed out on the date/hair continuity problems, but honestly, it doesn't make a difference to me. i'll pay attention next time around cause i'm curious though.

this movie is a fucking treasure, a film i'll watch over and over again just to introduce the unfamiliar. i don't ever think i'll own a record of theirs, but damn do i LOVE METALLICA. this was the perfect dessert to "A Year In the Life..."

you can practically hear the antics and absurdity in their records so i don't understand what the surprise is with this "expose." metallica has always been lame. enjoy it for what it is, not what it isn't.

"my lifestyle determines my death style"

-Andrew

brew wrote:metallica has always been lame.

really? even in the mid-80's?