Ratso Rizzo.

... check this guy out, eh?

Crap has kind of become one of those inside jokes.

I used to post a lot on one of those "insider" message boards but I stopped because it became too time consuming.

One of the things I like about this board is that the people who post here usually actually have lives, and they have better things to do than to post here. Well, except for me.

Hurry up and think of some creepy exclusive social tradition so we can test it out tomorrow night at the Abbey Pub where we might actually make up a sizeable enough proportion of the population to scare people.

Surely the lexicon would somehow involve fake Italian...

i have a selection of hats here that i mite consider wearing.... but im unusure exactly how hilarious they are. (some of them may only be mildly amusing) - does anybody know a formula for determining a hat's hilarity?

A hat is hilarious if

1. it employs the entire visual color spectrum.

2. has polka dots or checkers.

3. it is flourescent green, pink, etc....

4. it says "NASCAR"

5. it has a brim that exceeds two times the diameter of the cap/dome-piece.

6. it has bells, badly placed buttons, pins, pin-on buttons, novelty squirtguns, etc...

7. it exceeds one foot in height-off-head dimension analysis.

8. it has a dome-piece volume sufficient for the Elephant Man, but is being worn by a pin head.

8. it has more than one peak.

9. it has three corners.

10. it is mis-shapen due to a few months of supporting the 'short-legged' couch.

11. it is a fez.

12. it is a yamika.

13. it is a ten gallon hat.

14. it is a top hat.

15. it is a sombrero.

16. it is of the jester/cat in the hat/smelly hippie dreadlock holder variety

17. it has artificial hair/eyes/ears dangling from it.

18. it has a beer holder on either side.

19. it lights up.

20. it has a propeller.

andrew-

you know very well that our conversation was neither on ICQ nor AIM. it was without a doubt through vulcan mind-meld techniques. at this point we discussed how vulcan mind-meld was in fact a superior communication skill because our thoughts were instantly communicated in a direct trasfer of brain waves, and didn't have to go through the dithering and resampling rate of ICQ. and AIM? fuck man, don't get me started on AIM.

-nick

come to think of it, i should be mind melding this communication.

nick92675 wrote:come to think of it, i should be mind melding this communication.

His hilarious hats keep blocking the signal.

yeah thats a fairly comprehensive hat / hilarity guide... but i think the jester/rastafarian hats have become a bit passe these days and as such not as hilarious

oh yeahr & what about hats with fruit on em?

The smelly-hippie-dreadlock-holders are ludicrously tragic I guess. Like when a clown gets hit by a car, once so funny, but now just sad. These hats with fruit that you speak of, are you talking about the Chiquita bannana girl? Yes, this would be hilarious, if it is indeed a hat and not just a balanced basket of fruit.

Also hilarious:

Hats with a tail.

Hats with external feathers.

Hats with horns of any sort.

Hats with ear flaps (South of U.S. I-80)