23
by SixFourThree_Archive
Eclectic, palette, rivulet and gloaming...
Have, are and always will be my go-to words for when I've had the prescribed amount to drink in order to deal with the eclectic mix of morons at any given social gathering that includes:
Couples 'shopping for a new condo', couples 'shopping for a new Volvo', couples living beyond their means but still manage to put up a seemingly believable materialistic facade, couples insisting for your reassurance of how great of a couple they make, couples whispering about other couples while their away from the table, couples engaged in a heated game of Scruples/Jenga/Pictionary or Princetonopoly, couples fawning over a series of 2" x 2" wallet-warped baby pictures, couples arguing about who made who late for such-and-such's wedding in L.A. last weekend, couples asking advice on which color to paint the window trim in the bathroom, couples making out in front of the other couple who's having problems, couples who bitch about how trying it's been to plan their wedding, couples asking me 'how things are going' while at a sporting event, couples asking advice about where they should go on their honeymoon, couples who argue over which pet's better - the cat or the dog, couples who insist that thier 'how we met' story is so important that they insist on turning the music down... and couples who cut down the single people who were polite enough to show, but decided to leave early in search of the two hours they lost being polite enough to show up to a couples-saturated get-together.
I always like to say at some point, after .05 - .07 in the bloodwork, to the couples who like to insinuate that they got it much better than my girlfriend and me, "Have you been to Galena? Oh, you must go. It's such an eclectic palette of tourist, locals and quaint antique shops. You guys would love it. And you gotta' get a picture taken of the two of you on the bridge over the town's rivulet in the gloaming - trust me - it'll make the perfect Christmas card."
