Childish Beliefs

74
I thought that the factories I would see belching steam and God-knows-what in Cleveland were the source of clouds and referred to them as "cloud makers".
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C'mon! Are ya with me?!!

I remember howling when seeing a picture of modern Japan where not one woman in sight was in Geisha garb. I completely lost interest in Japan at hearing they dressed like the rest of us now.

I also believed the world was black and white in olde tymes.

The first books I read on my own were fairy tale collections, Shel Silverstein books and Encyclopedia Brown stories. Because of the arrangement of these particular books, I thought you could open any book at the beginning of a chapter and start there. Nancy Drew wised me up.

And I definitely believed all vans were driven by kidnappers. Wouldn't even walk on the same side of the street as one. This was somewhat affirmed when at age 11, I was asked to join a mustachioed creepazoid for a ride in a van. I identified the dude in a line-up of mustachioed creepazoids and I think he went to the pokey.

Vans still kinda creep me out.
H-GM wrote:Still don't make you mexican, Dances With Burros.

Childish Beliefs

77
I had this strange hunch that babies were made by the man hooking up some kind of tube apparatus to the woman. The two parents would sit down together, legs crossed Indian-style, and pump whatever fluids needed to be pumped via one of those enema squirters.

Up until I saw the Nickelodeon educational special on AIDS (this was around the time of Magic Johnson's publicization of the disease) I thought that "sex" meant for a man to French Kiss a woman. Linda Ellerbee opened my eyes by stretching a condom around her hand and telling me the dirty truth.

I also remember watching a movie about the Holocaust and being scared that such a thing might happen again. After reading about the Patriot Act and Guantanamo, I'm now convinced that it will happen again. O my prophetic soul!

Childish Beliefs

79
WoundedFoot wrote:I used to believe sex was just rubbing of the genitals. Thats all. Rubbing them against eachother. Watching porn at 11 or so made me realize there was penetration.

I also thought "anal sex" was people having sex by rubbing their buttcheeks together.

Man, I really like this username "WoundedFoot". That's an excellent username, at least as far as usernames go.

Salut, WoundedFoot, you of the strange and cool username!

When I was a child, I believed that vampires lived among us. This is a belief that I hold to this day.

Fuck you, vampires!

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