It is 3:47 in the morning and I can't stop watching Burn Notice.

edit: Oh and that was my 4000th post.

So let me just say this...cock.

Steve V. wrote:edit: Oh and that was my 4000th post.

So let me just say this...cock.

Damn it all, I just missed watching my post odometer turn over.

penis penis penis

I'll bet that I wasted my 1000th post arguing with Rick Reuban...

BadComrade wrote:I've just returned home from my ex-girlfriend's wedding.

She looks a little young for you, Mr. Hall!

The Stickleback

One of the finest tools ever created.

I am baffled by it's absence in the horror movie genre as a murder weapon.


It also goes well with delicious cheesecake.

fancyjamtime wrote:I almost ran over a broken fat guy who had jumped off the roof of a 6 story building. He broke his limbs and some ribs but the head was fine. I stayed with him until the police arrived. He was screaming but otherwise not lucid.

My wife asked if I messed with his moobs while the police were enroute. I told her that, unfortunately, he had landed on his front and I was unable to flip him over. His ass was one huge black and blue mark so it's possible that he landed on his ass then rolled over. His thigh bone was sticking out of his thigh.

yikes. post some thoughts in the suicide thread.

Last night the lady and I went out for dinner and drinks for the first time in over two months (we've been living on a limited income recently). After we finished eating and were doing the six or seven block walk to the bars, an older guy in a beaten up Orlando Magic shirt asked me if I could spot him $0.15. I've become so accustomed to not carrying cash that I usually just tell people "Sorry, I don't have anything on me." The guy looked genuinely disappointed when I said as much, so I decided to pull my wallet out and see what I could do. Turns out I had some old dollar I'd forgotten about that had probably been sitting in there for three or four weeks. I forked over the paper without hesitation, and the guy was excited because he could afford a beer (his words).

That felt really nice.

Nina wrote:

The Stickleback

One of the finest tools ever created.

You know, you have the answer to the Owen problem right there.

Maurice wrote:

Nina wrote:

The Stickleback

One of the finest tools ever created.

You know, you have the answer to the Owen problem right there.

I wish.

The stickleback is two inches from me right now, Owen is about 10 inches away. I could reach him from this chair without even straining my back.

I am up for suggestions on how to get him to leave though. He knows I hate him, so that's why he is here. He enjoys the game of making me uncomfortable.
Revers psychology does not work either.
The whole thing is very exhausting.

I'm going to share a very sad one from today.
Not wanting sympathy but will feel good to get it off my chest.

About six months ago my Mom had to have a series of brain surgeries that have left her with permanent brain damage. She's unable to walk or do anything for herself. The part of her brain that was affected controls balance, movement, cognition etc.. She was a strong independent, vibrant and fiery woman. I was dancing to Billy Childish in my favorite club in London with my boyfriend whom I miss terribly when I got the call that this was happening. I came to Pittsburgh immediately and moved here from Chicago to take care of her. The prognosis is that she will never recover and the surgeries, although they saved her life, resulted in leaving her with the mental capacity of a small child.

They sent her home to me three months ago now with a trach, a feeding tube and a wheelchair. I figured it all out and last month the trach came out and this week we graduated to food and the feeding tube was removed. That is uber positive.
The situation is beyond heartbreaking. Her quality of life is questionable at best and although I do my best to make it comfortable and make her smile or feel good in any way, it's not one I would elect for myself or anyone I really loved. I literally pray for any moments of joy for her.

She was single, I have no siblings, my extended family are horrible and have been little help, if anything they have made things harder for me and my Mom. They are more concerned with vulturing her money, which I can't stop them from doing. My Mom is a beautiful Italian woman and owned and ran a very successful strip club here in Pittsburgh. She has her son running it with no transparency whatsoever to me. My family are raping it for their own profit. Her sister has her power of attorney. Since I lived in Chicago I agreed with my Mom years ago that would be a good idea being that I trusted them and never saw something quite like this coming. That means I am unable to stop them or hire the help quality that I would choose to keep her at home. I don't want her to end up in a care facility. I have figured out the solution is that I have had the aunt hire herself, her friends and her/my own family to come here and take over for me so I can at least go to work, to the store or just get out, although the latter pretty rarely. They pay themselves three times what I make playing in a big warehouse with records but for me it's priceless time. Blabbing on an internet forum or playing in a fantasy footie league is something that I now have personal time for and the kinds of things I'm able to do when she rests.

I know if any of you are bored enough to read this you might say something like hire an attorney. Well, I've always been the heir to this and it's never meant anything to me. I've never wanted to live here or have any part in the business. Chicago was my home. To gain legal custody of my Mom means staying here for what could be twenty or thirty more years. Her vitals are perfect. I love her so much but just want to leave and get on with my life as long as she's being taken care of well and I can come and visit her.

That's the background, here's the moment:


This morning I was giving her a shower and she started to cry. I asked her what was wrong. She said, "I'm never going to get any better am I"?

I looked her right in her eyes and said, "Don't be silly, of course you will", knowing full well that was a lie.

Then she said, "You'll never leave me will you?" And I said, "Of course not Mom". When I know for certain I'm not sure how much longer I can handle this, and every day all I want to do is get out of here forever and move all of my stuff to England.

I feel like a real asshole for lying to her and even worse for wanting to get out of here so bad. In fact I'm planning to leave for a few months come October and am excited every day for it. I'm sure that does not make me a bad person.

Cheers.

Well that is just an phenomenally sad situation. You are an incredible person for dealing with it as well as you are. I don't know how you are coping. You must have a huge reserve of inner strength. I am hoping that it pulls you through.

I don't know what to say apart from hang in there. Good luck to you, I am sure there is light at the end of the tunnel, even if it is only a pin-point at the moment.