The hell i would!

I was Werner Klemperer's pool boy for a whole summer, and man does that guy get is hands on Heinies.

Theswede wrote:[T]here is no other way to sing passionately at sweaty men acceptably in Bush's America.

Au contraire, mon frere.

Wow. It just never stops being funny, frightening and pathetic.

gcbv wrote:I'm in a band called "HOOOOGANNNN!".

You guys are great. I saw you open for John Cougar Concentration Camp.

I really liked your song "Token Black Cast Member Whose Name I Cannot Remember".

Be your very own Sean 'Puffy' Combs and Create Your Own Band Here



Here's my band THREE MINUTE REICH that I created earlier.

Cranius!

This is just so fabulously wrong. I was nearly sick laughing when I saw MCMike in action. 'Kristi' plays the keyboard like a giant crab or someone pulling her arms on strings, it's quite unsettling to watch.

Theswede wrote:I have met really cool girls, and most of them love it when i tell them about my band! Oh, and if it's girls yer after, make sure you explain your abilities at changing time signatures. They love that shit.

that's what this one guy who's in my band tries all the time but it never works...

yo, youz guys should all check my band, Beard of Bees. here's a flier.
right on, that's cool.
yeah- we play slow-core/grind/stoner rock and all have really boss Neurosis beards...BUT MADE OF LIVE ANGRY BEES! see these scars on my face, man? that ain't from shaving! no shit!
anyway, the crowd gets all tweeked and cranked when we all stand with our poweraxes and our legs as far apart as we can get them as we rock our bee-beards up and down stoner-core style like mecha-maniacal metronomes of filth-fury!!! check it!
the bees get all into it too and fly into the pit like the righteous airbourne army of a god that knows no mercy. FUKK-YEAHH! it's so brutal!
our last show was so sick! we released a batallion thirty-strong of humanity-despising lesbian vegan crust bike messengers onto the audience. i swear, our tunes make those biaches CRAZZYY!!!
only they weren't delivering videotapes or packages of hate-crime beauracrat propaganda- know what i'm saying? right on!
yeah- they were hand delivering (pun intended, brah) fistfuls of Beard of Bees justice! the scales are tipping my friend! yes, they are!
anyone who can make it past the front line and on to the stage may partake of a Beard of Bees spirit cleansing, where you may beg to be covered with vegan honey (and eventually bees) and breathe from the TUNNEL. dude, what's the TUNNEL, you ask? listen up!
it's a digiridoo that's also a bong that's also an anarchist howitizer that shoots projectiles of flaming turd and Peanut Chew! my squatmate made it out of two large "Beard of Bees- blessed" tomato pies rolled together into a tube and glued together with HOLY WATER which is what Beard of Bees calls the sweat extracted from our bodies and army pants after shows.
ARE YOUU LISTENING TO ME!?!?! THIS SHIT IS SERIOUS MAN!!!!!

uh- anyway- we're on hiatus right now.
we'll start playing basement shows again once the drummer moves back from the Coast- until then, do you know where the Barnes & Noble is around here? HEY, FUKK OFF MAN!!!
YOU DIDN"T HEAR ME ASK YOU FOR MONEY, DID YOU?????
YOU FUKK!!! I CAN"T BELIEVE I LET YOU PET MY DOG, MAN!!!

Aight... The Band is Called "Rude2Rachael" and as far as i can see, we're gonna have the Clortho Jug Machine, Me on the "electric" Cafateria, and our Rachel Hater #1 WalterMalling on the "Jumbo Jackass finger Cymbals". Someone book some time with Steve, cause this shits got the big time rit Large across it's ass.

wait, fuck you i am now in the band too. i am in rude2rachael. take note suckers.

My band is:

UNITED AGAINST JOHN

because we each know a different John who has really fucked us over.

If Les Claypool and John McLaughlin had a baby, it would be our bassist/composer.

We have a show at the Triple Rock in Minneapolis on June 8, so all you Twin City folks poke yer head in th' door.

i am definitely not in that band