Donkey Punch = You're fucking a chick doggystyle... and you've already loosened up the ass a bit for somewhat "easy access". Now right when you are about to cum... take your dick out, and jam it in her ass, and punch her in the back of the head as your dick slides in. The suprise (Donkey) punch will cause her sphincter muscles to tighten up/contract around your dick. I know, I know... pretty bad.

La Chispa = Get your hand. Straighten out/extend your middle finger, and your index finger (and have them touching). Now straighten out/extend your pinky. Use your thumb to hold down your ring finger. This is La Chispa, aka The Shocker! Two in the pink, and one in the stink... you get the idea!

Oh yeah... you can't forget The Money Shot, and a Hot Lunch!

Wrong Number: You're stickin your tool up her\his stool. When, just as your about to climax, you pull out and cum on their back. When they turn around to see what the fuck is going on, you clock 'em over the head with one of those old black rotary phones.

Strawberry Milkshake: While getting a BJ, make a quick jab to your partners nose, the mixture of blood and semen in their mouth is a good approximation of a melted strawberry milkshake.

What's a Harriet Tubman?

The One-Eyed Pirate... a perennial favorite around here:

Very simple, you're fucking from behind (either hole, up to you, or your girl/boy i guess)... You wrap one hand around behind your head and cover the opposite eye with your hand, like an eyepatch, then you hit your partners ass with your other hand and yell "YARRRR"... the key is you have to stop before they turn around and see... the beauty is that it is degrading and totally self-gratifying... it may sound boring, but I know that they don't like it, cause my girlfriend caught me once...

ANY-way... The meat-hook is another good one.

the angry dragon will always be a classic. the rodeo and the houdini (a twist on the "wrong number") are key as well.

the african brush fire, while difficult to perform and dangerous, also deserves mention.

cheers.

The Rolodex of Love

Compliments of Rotten.com.

Wow, thanks. That was a great read over my lunch break!

Braden wrote:Wow, thanks. That was a great read over my lunch break!

Oh don't be such a Grumblepuss McCrabbypants, you know you love it.

Re: "Playin' the Trombone."

The name for this one is actually "The Rusty Trombone."

I'm pretty sure that this one is the Houdini... but here goes...

When you know you're going to lay some pipe... you have a friend hide in the closet in the room that you will be fucking in. You also have to make sure that the bed you use is near a window. And that window must be open (ie no blinds/drapes closed). There should be a clear view of the outside. You commence to fucking... and eventually get into doggystyle position. Now, cue your friend at this point. He comes out of his hiding spot. Now you pull out, and he goes in. You quietly exit the room, and get dressed. Now run outside to the open window by the bed where the fucking is taking place. Make sure the chick is facing the window. Now you bang on the window to get her attention... and wave as she looks up at you. The look should be priceless.

XBangyrdead wrote:I'm pretty sure that this one is the Houdini... but here goes...

When you know you're going to lay some pipe... you have a friend hide in the closet in the room that you will be fucking in. You also have to make sure that the bed you use is near a window. And that window must be open (ie no blinds/drapes closed). There should be a clear view of the outside. You commence to fucking... and eventually get into doggystyle position. Now, cue your friend at this point. He comes out of his hiding spot. Now you pull out, and he goes in. You quietly exit the room, and get dressed. Now run outside to the open window by the bed where the fucking is taking place. Make sure the chick is facing the window. Now you bang on the window to get her attention... and wave as she looks up at you. The look should be priceless.

err... isn't that rape?