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Pickup Lines

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 12:11 pm
by instant_zen_Archive
Marsupialized wrote:Ok, went to my work xmas party last night.
There's a new girl everyone thinks is hot, but she's not really. It's just there's no other even remotely attractive girls working there, so by default everyone wants to bang this girl.
Dude walks up to her and says 'You know who you look like? Fiona Apple!'
She thinks for a minute and says 'Fiona Apple looks like she has AIDS'
He says 'Well, you kinda look like her'


this reminds me of something a friend of mine once told me. he goes to Harvard, and he says that since there aren't any girls that are actually attractive there, you develop what are called "Harvard Goggles," which are sort of like beer goggles, but more severe.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 8:59 am
by aaron_Archive
greg wrote:-You look old. Have you had babies?

-No!

-You look old.


you're joking, but this kind of thing can actually be quite effective--especially with really attractive women used to being fawned over and having their asses kissed by everyone. it works on several different levels.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 10:36 pm
by hellyes!!_Archive
I had a short, bald dude of approximately 55 years old use the following lines on me just last week...

"You are beautiful. I like you. You have a Swedish chin just like my wife and 3 children."

Then, he told me repeatedly that he really likes me because I am very "proper." (NOTE: There were many drunken slutty girls dancing just steps away from where I was sitting...AND, I had pushed off a drunken groper minutes before). Shortly after that he asked if I smoked pot and said I could park in his lot across from the bar anytime I wanted. Just tell 'em, "Greek Pete said it was okay."

The sad thing is...That was the best compliment I've gotten in weeks!! I had to admire the man's guts, too. And, this all came AFTER my brother had warned, "Stay away. She doesn't like you," as I was unaware since my back was turned while watching the band.

What's even funnier is that as this old perv made his moves on me, I noticed the more attractive, younger guys creeping in closer like the alpha males protecting their herd. Yet, none of these guys made an attempt to talk to me the whole night. I don't get it.

My point being....I think guys underestimate how much they can impress a girl simply by showing a little courage. Also, I think guys overestimate how many other guys they are competing against. Sure, pretty girls get hit on a lot but more times than not it's by old pervs or creepy weirdoes.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 11:08 pm
by burun_Archive
hellyes!! wrote:Shortly after that he asked if I smoked pot and said I could park in his lot across from the bar anytime I wanted. Just tell 'em, "Greek Pete said it was okay."

This is AWESOME. Think of the carte blanche you now have. You can do whatever you want, because Greek Pete says it's OK.

I hope you wield this power wisely.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 11:58 pm
by hellyes!!_Archive
burun wrote:
hellyes!! wrote:Shortly after that he asked if I smoked pot and said I could park in his lot across from the bar anytime I wanted. Just tell 'em, "Greek Pete said it was okay."

This is AWESOME. Think of the carte blanche you now have. You can do whatever you want, because Greek Pete says it's OK.

I hope you wield this power wisely.


Sadly, I know nothing about wielding my womanly powers. Pervy guy got it right-- I am proper. My power actually lies in my complete disregard for having any power. From what I understand, guys are suckers for girls playing with their hair and flashing a smile. Me? I watch the band like is...um, proper...and, oddly, I get noticed for watching the band. It's funny to me. I am trying to determine whether this works for me or against me.

Oh, and, I left out one of the best parts of my story....Pervy asked why it is that I have never been married. I responded with a shrug to which he replied, "You want the world. Am I right?" I paused, working up a response when he interrupted me and said, "And, you deserve it."

Now THAT is a good line.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 1:16 am
by Brett Eugene Ralph_Archive
hellyes!! wrote:
burun wrote:
hellyes!! wrote:Shortly after that he asked if I smoked pot and said I could park in his lot across from the bar anytime I wanted. Just tell 'em, "Greek Pete said it was okay."

This is AWESOME. Think of the carte blanche you now have. You can do whatever you want, because Greek Pete says it's OK.

I hope you wield this power wisely.


Sadly, I know nothing about wielding my womanly powers. Pervy guy got it right-- I am proper. My power actually lies in my complete disregard for having any power. From what I understand, guys are suckers for girls playing with their hair and flashing a smile. Me? I watch the band like is...um, proper...and, oddly, I get noticed for watching the band. It's funny to me. I am trying to determine whether this works for me or against me.

Oh, and, I left out one of the best parts of my story....Pervy asked why it is that I have never been married. I responded with a shrug to which he replied, "You want the world. Am I right?" I paused, working up a response when he interrupted me and said, "And, you deserve it."

Now THAT is a good line.


It sounds to me like you just might be ready to find out why they call him "Greek Pete."

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 8:18 am
by M_a_x_Archive
I only ever use official pickup lines as used by Morris Day in the movie Purple Rain. Favourite: "I like that dress. It makes you look young".
Morris Day!

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 8:33 am
by Marsupialized_Archive
hellyes!! wrote:I had a short, bald dude of approximately 55 years old use the following lines on me just last week...

"You are beautiful. I like you. You have a Swedish chin just like my wife and 3 children."

Then, he told me repeatedly that he really likes me because I am very "proper." (NOTE: There were many drunken slutty girls dancing just steps away from where I was sitting...AND, I had pushed off a drunken groper minutes before). Shortly after that he asked if I smoked pot and said I could park in his lot across from the bar anytime I wanted. Just tell 'em, "Greek Pete said it was okay."

The sad thing is...That was the best compliment I've gotten in weeks!! I had to admire the man's guts, too. And, this all came AFTER my brother had warned, "Stay away. She doesn't like you," as I was unaware since my back was turned while watching the band.

What's even funnier is that as this old perv made his moves on me, I noticed the more attractive, younger guys creeping in closer like the alpha males protecting their herd. Yet, none of these guys made an attempt to talk to me the whole night. I don't get it.

My point being....I think guys underestimate how much they can impress a girl simply by showing a little courage. Also, I think guys overestimate how many other guys they are competing against. Sure, pretty girls get hit on a lot but more times than not it's by old pervs or creepy weirdoes.


...and sometimes girls overestimate how attractive they are and think every dude within 50 yards is trying desperately to get into their pants.
'I know they wanna fuck me, but they are too scared to come up and try' uh, yeah...I mean, if it makes you feel better about yourself to think that way go right ahead....but.....
I remember a little exchange where you yapped on and on about how your life is just ruined because you are so attractive that you can't step one foot outside your front door without being hit on every guy who comes near you....
Now you complain that guys are not coming up to you and hitting on you.
Typical woman. Self obsessed, full of shit.

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 5:57 pm
by ctrl-s_Archive
aaron wrote:
greg wrote:-You look old. Have you had babies?

-No!

-You look old.


you're joking, but this kind of thing can actually be quite effective--especially with really attractive women used to being fawned over and having their asses kissed by everyone. it works on several different levels.

Sometimes this sort of thing can also work with men who are used to getting sexual attention from women without having to make a lot of effort. Just sort of pointing out, subtly or not, that they are also total fucking dweebs can have surprising results. (Which is not the same thing as saying that there's anything wrong with being a total fucking dweeb -- I should know, certainly.)

Pickup Lines

Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 6:31 pm
by glynnisjohns_Archive
Image


works everytime, if of course you're wearing a kimono.