The Comedy of Craigslist
Posted: Wed Oct 24, 2007 11:01 am
otisroom wrote:Marsupialized wrote:I need advice about A.A. (Burbank)
Reply to: pers-387206259@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-01, 6:41PM CDT
I drank heavily for some 15 years till my doctor told me I had pretty serious kidney damage and had to stop drinking. So I joined Alcoholics Anonymous, and I fucking HATED it, but I did stop drinking.
Well, I've been sober for almost 3 years now and a couple weeks ago I read about something called "auto-erotic asphyxiation"- basically you wrap a belt or something around your neck to cut off the blood from your brain and when you whack off the pressure builds until your about to pass out, then right as you cum you release the belt and the rush of blood intensifies the orgasm like 1000 times.
It's supposed to be a MAJOR buzz and you can do it without messing up your sobriety!
I've been trying this all this last weekend and this week and I must be doing it wrong because it's not working. I tried it with a belt and it wouldn't get tight enough, so then I tried it with a bungee cord with hooks on the ends. I wrapped this bungee cord around my neck like 8 times and hooked it and started beating off like CRAZY and all that happened was the blood vessels in my eyes bursted so I've had to wear sunglasses all week long to hide my blood-red eyes.
They look so gross!
Then I tried it with a length of rope and kinda hung myself from my shower curtain rod, but right when I was about to cum the rod broke and I fell and whacked my head against the sink, and the rough rope tore the shit out of my neck and bruised it all up so I've had to wear turtleneck shirts to work all week, and it's SO fucking hot everyone thinks I'm drinking again cuz I've been wearing the sunglasses and turtlenecks all the time and I have a big purple knot on my head where I hit the sink.
What am I doing wrong?
Why isn't it working?
I've though about getting some rubber hose and trying with that but I've already wasted like 40$ on belts and bungee cord and rope so I need to get this right, I'm kinda low on cash till I get paid next week.
Serious Replies Only.
* Location: Burbank
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
No fair Marsup. You can't post your own adds.
I have serious reply for this bozo: "If make me the beneficiary of your Life Insurance Policy, I will reveal the "secret" you are so avidly seeking."
This guy is clearly working a solid program, eh?